Page 6 of Damnation
He presses his lips into a hard line. “How can it not?”
I shrug, not sure what to say. Of course it matters, but what’s done is done, and talking about it now won’t change things. Because I don’t intend to give up on Thomas any more than my mother intends to rethink her beliefs about him. So I pull my knees up to my chest, rest my chin on them, and shutter myself inside a painful silence.
Realizing that he’s not going to get any more of an explanation on this matter, Thomas runs a frustrated hand through his hair, stands up, and grabs a pack of Marlboros out of his jeans pocket. He sticks a cigarette in his mouth and lights it, inhaling deeply before sitting back down next to me, legs slightly spread. All of this he does without taking his eyes off of me. “What are you gonna do now?”
I shrug. “Nothing.”
“Nothing?”
I raise my head to glare at him. “I don’t have anywhere else to go. If I had a father in my life and that father lived in Corvallis, I would have another option, I suppose. But he’s not here. He’s busy being a dad to his son somewhere else, and there’s no room in his life for me. My income from the Marsy is barely enough to pay rent on a run-down one-bedroom on the outskirts of town, not to mention the fact that I have no idea how I’ll pay for school expenses now. So yeah, I don’t intend to do anything. I’m just going to sit here and do absolutely nothing.” I put my chin back on my knees again, exhausted by the whole situation.
Thomas lets me vent without saying anything, and after finishing his cigarette in total silence, he stands up, holds out his hand, and tells me, “C’mon, I’ll take you somewhere.”
I give him a bewildered look. “Now?”
He nods. “Right now. Night’s still young, and it doesn’t make any sense to stay here.”
I peer uncertainly at his extended hand, and for a moment, I feel a sense of déjà vu. I remember that evening almost two months ago when he invited me to the frat house with him. I had only known him for a week, yet it had taken me less than five seconds to accept. And clearly nothing has changed between then and now, because, despite everything, I would still follow him wherever he wanted to lead me.
“Okay,” I say with a faint smile. “Where are you taking me?”
He smiles in that familiar arrogant way that makes him so irresistible. “You’ll find out.”
Then he takes me by the hand, grabs my bag from off the ground, and walks me to his motorcycle.
***
We hurtle down the dark, wet streets of Corvallis, my arms wrapped around Thomas’s waist, before arriving on campus. Thomas turns off the engine, kicks out the stand, and, with one foot on the ground, peersaround as though looking for someone. Who does he think he’s going to find on campus at this time, other than a security guard?
I slacken my arms around his middle. After we take off our helmets, he asks me to grab his phone out of the pocket of the leather jacket I’m still wearing. I hand it to him and watch him type out a text. We get off the motorcycle, and Thomas puts the phone back in his jeans pocket. Before I can ask him what we’re doing here, I see he’s rolled up the sleeve of his sweatshirt far enough to expose his wrist. He unties the black bandanna he always wears there and hands it to me. “Put it on.”
I stare at him, dumbfounded. “I’m sorry, what’s this for?”
“Blindfold,” he answers decisively, smirking at me.
I cock an eyebrow. “What the heck are you up to, Collins?”
He gives me an amused grin before a whistle draws our attention, making us turn around. A tall blond boy with a lean athletic frame emerges from the men’s dorm. “I’ve gotta get something; then you’ll see,” Thomas explains, before heading for the other guy.
At first, I don’t recognize him, but after getting a closer look at him, I think he’s the same guy I’ve seen with Thomas in the cafeteria a few times. They give each other shoulder bumps, and I can see them laughing together. Eventually, his friend looks over at me and gives me a very telling smile. I can practically hear the “Niiiice” from here. I cross my arms over my chest and watch as the stranger hands Thomas a key. They exchange a few more jokes before saying goodbye. I can’t restrain my curiosity when he gets back to me. “What was that?” I ask cautiously, unrolling the bandanna.
“He plays on the hockey team.”
“And why did he give you that key?”
Thomas sighs theatrically as he loops the two helmets over his right forearm and grabs the key out of bike’s ignition. “You ask too many questions, Ness. Too many questions. Just tie that bandanna over your eyes and trust me.”
I snort loudly, unable to hold back a grin. “Hey, you’re not taking me to some freaky playroom now, are you? Because, if that is the case,I should let you know that I don’t do S and M, and I am not letting you smack me with a riding crop,” I say as I blindfold myself.
He bursts into laughter so spontaneously that it makes my chest vibrate, and I forget all about the crap that happened last night. He wraps his arms around my waist and brings his mouth to my ear. His warm breath tickles my skin. “Fuck, guess I’ll have to stick to the Italian kiss.” I feel him laugh into my neck and then immediately give it a nip.
“The fact that I have no idea what this ‘Italian kiss’ is makes me kind of a loser, huh?”
“But you do know what it is. You know it very well.” I can feel him grinning again.
“Oh…” I fall silent, embarrassment heating my cheeks.
“But don’t worry, I don’t want to do any of that right now.”
