Page 69 of This Blood That Binds Us
“Of course. How could I forget? You don’t care about anything! This is all easy for you. So, fuck you, too.”
“Aaron, come on. I thought we were past this.” Presley looked defeated. “Let’s just finish and—”
“Past it!? I’m just getting started.” I snarled. “You have no idea how I feel. How could any of you? You only care about us. But what does that make us? It makes us monsters! We’re bad people, and I used to be a good person, but I can’t be anymore because of you and shitty decisions!”
I couldn’t convey the betrayal I felt since the day I was changed. They were the reason I was forced to hunt people in the first place and risk killing them. I was tired of the burden. Tired of the fear.
Luke’s solemn face washed over me, pulling me out of the flames and straight onto ice.
The pain in their eyes felt like an ice bath after a dip in the hot tub. It looked different in each of their eyes. Zach was pissed at me. Presley desperately wanted peace, and Luke just looked disappointed. I hated the bond we had sometimes. I wanted to be mad at them. To hate them for all the times they let me down, but I couldn’t. No peace came from loving or hating them.
“Are you done?” Luke waited in silence, the carnival sounds playing an amalgamation of melodies in the background.
I didn’t say anything, and turned back toward the carnival lights. They didn’t try to follow me. I fought the knot in my stomach and the urge to turn back. For the first time in my life, I wanted to be alone.
I tapped myfoot as the clock on the wall ticked by in an achingly, slow crawl. The professor proceeded to overexplain the requirements for our finals. His monotone voice only made my eyes heavy with boredom. I rubbed my sweaty palms together and counted each tick of the clock. A change had taken place in me. It was as if a hidden part of me was coming alive. Things grew more important than school. I wasn’t spending all my time thinking of the next thing. I was completely present in my own life.
“All right, class. You’re dismissed.” Begrudgingly, he furrowed his eyebrows.
I got up and fought my way to the door. Once in the hall, I barreled toward the exit. The courtyard was booming with a flurry of activity. It was the last week before finals, and students who were previously less invested started to show up again.
“Boo!”
Aaron’s voice startled me.
“Jesus! Be careful. Don’t you know there are dangerous vampires afoot?” I joked.
“How could I forget?”
Aaron was dressed in his hiking boots and flannel shirt. He had a tattered canvas bag strapped across his shoulder that looked almost exactly like the one I had thrifted years ago. I’d since decorated it with various patches from all the places around the mountains I visited and hiked.
“I can’t believe I can’t go camping alone now because of vampires.” I sighed as we walked toward my dorm.
I had just a few more things to pack for our trip up the mountain. We were planning on staying all weekend, and Aaron had convinced Luke to let him go despite the seclusion.
“You should probably get used to that, seeing as you’re a vampire magnet and all.” Aaron smiled.
My phone vibrated in my backpack pocket, and I checked it.
It was Chris. Again.
I turned it off and put it back.
Aaron raised an eyebrow. “Are you ever going to answer him or keep him in suspense?”
“I don’t know. I’m not his biggest fan right now.”
It was easier to ignore him and focus on more important things like dangerous mystery vampires.
“Well, you did try to convince him vampires exist. Maybe the guy needs some time. You can’t ignore him forever,” Aaron said as we passed through the school garden. The smell of fresh flowers and pollen drifted in the air.
“Why are you being so level-headed right now?”
“You’re right. That’s your job, and I’m truly the last one who should be giving you advice right now.” Aaron stopped to pluck a huge white peony. He brought it up to his nose to smell it beforehanding it to me. “You’re doomed to receive flowers from me now until the end of time, since I know which is your favorite.”
Butterflies swarmed my stomach, and I sniffed the delicate flower in my hand. The petals were ivory, velvet between my fingers. “I think I can live with that.”
There was goodness growing among the darkness and confusion. My relationship with Aaron had brought me more joy than I wanted to admit. Something about his internal optimism quelled the fear of opening up. He relentlessly pursued me and my happiness. That was more than I could say for anyone else in my life, including Chris.
