Page 78 of Black
“Is it my turn to talk now?” I asked Bruce through gritted teeth.
“Tina, while Cia talks, you will not interrupt but write down as much as you can. Okay?”
She nodded and picked up the pen in front of her.
My voice shook with anger when I spoke. “I can’t believe you have the nerve to come andasksomething from me. You say you want to help me, but in reality you’re just here for you. You don’t care one bit about me – you’re just using me like you did when I was a child. And while we’re at it, how is Dennis? Are you still molesting children together?”
Tina looked pale.
Bruce gave her the word and I picked up my pen.
“Dennis left me right after you ran away from home. I don’t know what happened between you two, but if he did something to you, I’m sorry.”
“You’re sorry,” I snorted and didn’t wait for Bruce to give me permission to talk. “How dare you make it sound like you weren’t part of the abuse? You gave him blow jobs while he groped me, thinking I was sleeping. You allowed him to cum over my body and didn’t try to stop him.” My voice broke and tears streamed down my face. “You egged him on and got off on seeing him molest me, you sick fuck.” I spit out the last words.
Tina’s lips started quivering. “No, no, honey, you don’t understand.”
“You’re right, I’ll never understand how a mom can betray her own daughter like that. You were going to let him take my virginity the night I ran away. Admit it… he was about to rape me.”
Tina hid her face in her hands and cried, and we all waited for her to calm herself down. Bruce handed her a tissue.
“Tina, feel free to respond, when you’re ready.”
Tina dried her nose. “I was in a bad place and Dennis was so wonderful to me. I was blinded by him and deeply in love with him. That’s why I wasn’t thinking straight and he always knew exactly what to say… he promised you would never know about it and that it wouldn’t hurt you in any way. I believed him and I only egged him on to help you.”
“Bullshit,” Gabriel sputtered but Bruce held out a hand to silence him.
“Go on, Tina, you were saying.”
She blew her nose and reached for another tissue to dry her eyes. “He was completely out of my league and I wanted so bad for him to love me and felt lucky to have someone like him. I think that’s why I ignored the little signs.”
“What signs?” Bruce asked calmly.
Tina sniffled and looked at me. “It started out with small things. I noticed how he looked at you and then he would say your name when we had sex. I tried to tell him I wouldn’t have it, but then, whenever he threatened to leave me, I would get desperate and he would add on a tiny thing that I could do for him. He went from calling me Darcia when we made love to having me call him Daddy and begging him to take his little girl.” She sniffled again. “I hoped that would be enough, and to be honest, I’ve been with men that wanted much worse things than dirty talk, so I didn’t think too much of it, but then he wanted more and in time we had to be in your room where he could see and touch you while I satisfied him. I was so afraid that you would wake up, so I wanted him to get off as fast as possible to leave you alone. That’s why I talked dirty to him… I knew what to say in order to make him come faster, but I did it for you, I promise.”
I looked away.
“Please believe me, darling, I just tried to protect you.”
Gabriel formed a fist and I felt my nostrils flare in anger.
“Were you just trying toprotect mewhen you slipped me sleeping pills so he could rape me?”
She gave me a pleading look. “I was desperate, you don’t understand. I had no money, we were being put on the street, and he offered to pay if I would let him have you. It was only going to be that one time.”
I rolled my eyes and angrily dried away a tear that slipped from my eye. “I can’t believe how naïve you are.”
“I was trying to keep a roof over your head.”
“By selling my body.”
Tina opened her mouth to speak, but then she closed it again and sunk lower in her chair.
“It wasn’t like that,” she finally muttered.
“It wasexactlylike that,” I said with conviction.
My words hung in the air for a minute before Bruce spoke again. “Tina, now would be a good time to acknowledge the damage you did and apologize to Cia.”
