Page 21 of Gator's Gambit
Godric gets a look on his face, like he wants to say something but is choosing his words. I take the time to study – really study – his face, noticing the tiny telltale signs that he’s seen things during his career. Things most people will never know about, but that will haunt him for the rest of his life.
Just when I think he’s not going to say anything, he speaks, and it takes me a moment to understand what he’s referring to.“Is all of this why you never came to say hi? To let me know you were there?”
Now it’s my turn to choose my words, but decide if there’s ever going to be a time to be open and honest about my feelings, this is it. The conversation I never thought we’d ever have.
“Yeah.” I shift in my seat, uncomfortable with the level of vulnerability. “I wanted so badly to be a part of your big day. To see you graduate, decked out in all your finery. I just couldn’t bring myself to actually come talk to you – didn’t want to have to answer the inevitable questions or deal with the knowing looks.
“Or, at least, I figured you and your family would work out why I was there. So I hung back, happy enough that I got to see it, if nothing else. Once the graduation ceremony was over, before anyone could accidentally spot me, I disappeared quickly and quietly, hoping you’d never be any the wiser.”
“So what made you confess after all this time?”
“My mouth engaged before my brain?”
That rich, deep rumble of laughter I’ve always loved flows over me as Godric throws his head back in mirth. “Fair enough.”
Godric reaches out to cup his hands around my cheeks, thumbs resting on my jawline. His gaze fixes on my lips with an intensity I’ve never noticed before and, without conscious thought, my tongue darts out to wet them.
I watch with fascination as his gorgeous brown eyes darken. As if in slow motion, I register him leaning forward, and then his lips are on mine, his tongue tracing the seam demanding entry. And I’m helpless to refuse him.
I open up to him with a soft sigh of surrender, as if this is the moment I’ve waited for my whole life. He dives into the kiss with a level of passion I’ve not experienced from anyone else, ever. Granted, I don’t have much to draw on for comparison. A couple of lackluster relationships that were never going to go anywhere, mainly because they were poor substitutes for what I wanted allalong. Neither of which equipped me to deal with the force of nature that is Godric Soren.
My head spins, and just when I think I’m about to run out of oxygen, he lifts his head, leaving me dazed and reeling. Holy shit. That kiss was … well, I’m not sure I have the right words to accurately describe what that kiss was, but I’m one hundred percent sure I want him to do it again.
Prying my eyes open, I silently plead for another. Something of my thoughts must communicate themselves to Godric because he leans forward and treats me to a repeat performance.
When we’re both panting for air, he sits back, a satisfied look on his face. He takes my hand in his, laying tiny kisses up and down the exposed skin of my arm. Over the millions of tiny – and not so tiny – scars that crisscross my skin. Bearing witness to a childhood lived trying to keep up with others who didn’t need to be as careful as me. I’ve always considered these scars to be ugly, marring what was once perfectly unblemished skin. Yet, they don’t seem to faze him at all.
“I never thought I’d ever get to say this to you out loud, but I want you so badly I can’t stand it.” Godric’s words strike a chord in me.
“Same. It feels so weird. Everything about this is surreal. This is a conversation I’ve played out in my head more times than I can own up to, but not once did I ever think we’d find ourselves here.”
“I want to make love to you, but I don’t want our first time together to be in a borrowed car in the middle of a public park. I want to be able to worship you as you deserve to be worshipped – in comfort.”
Before I can reply, Godric’s phone rings. He curses ripely as he reaches for his phone. Hauling it out of his pocket, his expression tightens as he reads the caller’s name on the small screen.
“Knight, hey. What’s up?” I assume the person named Knight apologizes for calling because Godric replies, “No problem. What’s going on?”
He’s quiet for a bit while he listens to the voice on the other end. My heart sinks when he curses, yet again, and rubs at his neck with his other hand, the movements agitated.
“Sure thing. I’ll report to the base here for the medical in the morning and let you know what he says.” He listens some more. “Yeah, doc was happy with the progress last time I saw him, so it’s quite probable they’ll give me the all-clear. If that’s the case, I’ll arrange the first flight home I can get.”
While he’s talking, I can feel my entire body tighten in distress. It sounds like he’ll be leaving tomorrow, and it feels like my already shaky world is about to crumble. Finally, an amazing moment I truly believed wouldn’t happenisactually happening, and it’s coming to an end before we’ve even had a chance to explore where it could go.
It takes a moment for me to realize Godric’s call is over. I know it shouldn’t, but the look on his face has me feeling a tad better. A mixture of frustration and pain is clearly displayed there. His words echo my own unspoken thoughts.
“I’m being recalled for a mission, pending medical clearance, and for the first time in my career, I wish, with everything in me, that I could refuse to go. We’re only just discovering things about each other tonight, and the last thing I want to do is leave.”
“I wish you didn’t have to go either.” Battling back emotion, I thread my fingers through his. “Where does that leave us?”
Godric searches my face as if looking for answers to unasked questions. “I have no idea how long I’ll be gone, but would you be open to coming to visit me in Riverton, maybe explore where this could go? Would that even be possible?”
Warmth spreads through me in the region of my heart. “Yeah, I’d like that, very much.”
Pulling me into an awkward embrace, Godric rests his forehead on mine. “Good. I’ll let you know the minute I get back. You can count on that.”
10
GATOR
