Page 123 of Tangled Hearts
“Like the person he loves went through something traumatic and he wants to take care of you?” I ask, interrupting him.
He groans. “Yes. Ugh. I’m just so fucking tired of being the person who needs to be taken care of.”
I don’t want to make this moment strange, but at the same time, we’ve never shied away from difficult conversations. Part of why I feel so safe in this family is because of how open we are with each other. “I’m finding that it can be… nice to be taken care of.”
Holden blinks at me. “Gross. Nope. Stop. That’s mybrotheryou’re talking about.”
But he bursts out laughing, and so do I. He laughs until he’s got tears streaming down his face, and then he’s sobbing. “Hold,” I whisper, sitting up and hugging him.
“Sorry. Sorry. Give me a second, and I’ll get it together.”
His chest heaves against mine. “Shut up. You don’t need to get it together. You just need to let the people who love you… love you. Come on. There’s like a whole… cuddle station set up in the living room. Let’s go hang out with everyone. Let us take care of you, Uncle Hold. You’re always the one managing all of our shit. Let us manage yours a bit.”
He sits back, wiping at his face. “I’m really just tired of people seeing me at my worst.”
“It has to be some consolation that I’ve never seen you like this until a couple of nights ago. I have, however, watched my dad have a breakdown over a broken arm. That’s gotta make you feel a little good, at least.”
Holden chuckles. “Okay, that’s fair.”
I use my sleeve to wipe the tears off his face. “So, we’re gonna go out there, and you’re gonna feel what you feel. And if you cry, you cry. And you know we’ll love you no matter what. Julian, especially.”
“You’re awfully wise for your years,” Holden says, lips turning up in a smile.
“I hear trauma ages you.”
He lets out a startled laugh. “Isn’t that the truth?”
We walk into the living room together, and Julian’s head shoots up. He stares at Holden like he’s the only person to exist—the same way he always does.
I bump Holden with my shoulder. “Yeah, he looks positively fed up with your shit.”
“Hey, darlin’.” Julian flashes Holden a smile. “Come here, yeah? I have something for you.”
“Oh? What is it?” Holden asks, dropping my hand and stepping around the couch. As soon as he’s in grabbing distance, Julian tugs him into his lap. Holden gasps, then laughs. A carefree, happy laugh that makes me smile.
Julian wraps him up in his arms, holding him close to his body. “Nothing. I just wanted you in my arms.”
Nic and The Dads step into the living room from the kitchen. They’ve got their arms loaded down with bottles of water and snacks. Beck winks at me. “Okay. Come on. Everyone in the cuddle pile. We’re gonna watch a movie.”
“What are we watching?” Holden asks.
Nic steps up to me and takes my hand, leading me to the giant pile of blankets. Holden wiggles his way out of Julian’s arms and sits beside him. Nic settles himself on the floor beside Holden, and I sit down by Nic.
Nic seems surprised when Holden leans over, resting his head on his shoulder, but he gets a pleased little smile on his lips, laying his head on top of Holden’s.
The Dads settle in on the other side of me. “This is the most epic cuddle pile I’ve ever seen,” I say, glancing around.
Holden laughs. “What are we watching?” he asks again.
“Something funny,” Roman offers. “I can’t handle any jump scares right now. My dreams are already a mess without adding ghosts and demons to the mix.”
“Big baby,” Holden teases.
“I also veto scary movies,” Beck says.
“Bigger baby,” Holden repeats. Then he giggles. “Remember that time I put a Chucky doll in your bed as a prank?”
“What?” Nic asks, incredulous.
