Page 11 of Doubts of the Egoist
“That’s it. Open up for me,” Yugo encouraged, hips slapping against Kuon’s buttocks in a rapid, jarring rhythm. His cold hand wrapped around Kuon’s lubed shaft, sliding up and down in sync with his thrusts while the other massaged his balls. “You feel so good.”
Kuon’s insides were stretched to the limit. He wanted to scream and moan as Yugo moved him with furious passion. Yugo’s cock banged against his inner walls, searching for his prostate; when it found it, each pulse sent powerful electrical jolts through his body.
His knees shook, inner thighs throbbing with dull pain from countless bite marks. Sweat slicked between them, acting like glue whenever their bodies touched. Squelching, wet sounds echoed through the room. Yugo’s fingers struggled to maintain the bruising hold on his thighs and kept slipping. In his twitching gestures, Kuon read Yugo’s desire to flip him over and change their position, but something always held him back.
His ass was wet, and with every thrust of Yugo’s hips, warm stickiness leaked out, pooling under his tailbone. It was nasty and yet euphoric.
The silk sheets were soaking wet. The tie around Yugo’s neck slapped against Kuon’s chin, annoying. Kuon wrapped itsdisobedient end around his fist, shrinking the already non-existent distance between them to nothing. He was sure he’d found the long-lost piece of cold meat under his shoulder but couldn’t be bothered to toss it aside because Yugo’s mouth lavished his with infuriatingly slow, tender kisses.
The humidity caused the ends of Yugo’s straight hair to curl under his fingers. The air thickened and became stuffy, as if the heat of their bodies burned up all the oxygen in the unbearably hot room. It felt as if his lungs were slowly withering from hypoxia, pumping out exhaust fumes. Kuon couldn’t stop, though, as Yugo’s intoxicating scent intensified. Bitter tobacco… heady and zesty cologne… the musky scent of arousal. Yugo smelled of sex and a forgotten past, of sin and the darkest pleasure.
His short nails clawed at Yugo’s back as a climax ripped through him, choking out a soft moan. Spine arching, Kuon thrust into Yugo’s hand, coating it and his pubis with tepid fluid. Sweet convulsions twisted his muscles, overwriting his control, as an ardent whisper burned his earlobe with the command to relax. Kuon didn’t understand it, concentrating on the powerful slams of Yugo’s hips against his buttocks and his cock, sliding in and out of the stretched ring of his inner muscles.
At some point, his insides lost sensitivity, his cock was sore from overstimulation, but he wouldn’t stop. “More…”
Yugo obeyed and drove himself balls deep, jabbing the swollen head of his cock against the inflamed knot of Kuon’s overstimulated nerve endings.
Over and over and over.
Dizziness, disorientation, and a vague awareness of his messy state couldn’t stop him from falling into a catatonicslumber. Yugo still thrust into him, but Kuon could no longer get hard. His cock lay limp atop the thick coat of drying cum on his pubis. It was disgusting, but he couldn’t bring himself to lift a hand and wipe it off onto the sheet. At least he was fucked out enough to stop thinking about the meaning of Yugo’s words.
Colorful spots filled his mind’s eye. A little more and he would have slipped into oblivion if not for the hot tongue that invaded his mouth a moment before Yugo shuddered with a low growl. A tense second passed, and Yugo pulled away to collapse, panting at his side. Waves of pleasure surged through his limbs, echoing in Kuon through the places where they touched.
At some point, Yugo stood up. A jumble of sounds drifted in and out of his ears, never quite registering. It was easy to fall asleep. Deprived of visual stimulation, his mind had always been easily bored, and with the recent stress, the surgery, and a sleepless night, his grip on reality was slipping. He couldn’t bother to feel embarrassed when Yugo wiped him clean with a wet towel, then stuck two fingers inside him to scoop out the evidence of his own pleasure. Liquid warmth trickled out, and the burning inside him faded as Yugo smeared something cool over his entrance. Embarrassment stirred at the edge of his consciousness and vanished as thick slumber engulfed his lazy thoughts.
He drifted, letting Yugo roll him like a rag doll from one side of the bed to the other and back again while he changed the sheets. He couldn’t even tell if Yugo did it all by himself or had help. His awareness returned when a cool finger stroked a spot below his left eye.
“Hm?” was all he could manage.
“Sleep if youwant to,” Yugo murmured. The arousal faded; weariness stained Kuon’s pale face. His slack lips were swollen from all the kissing; the skin around the edges looked inflamed, and the places where he had stripped the skin off his lower lip began to brown. The straps holding the eye shields had darkened from sweat. “The lights are on, so keep your eyes closed while I change your bandages.”
“Uh-huh.”
Kuon didn’t flinch when Yugo carefully pulled at the soiled straps. The adhesive side, saturated with moisture, easily separated from Kuon’s skin and lifted the eye shields with it.
Since starting the scar treatment, the pink and brown around his eyes had faded a bit, but the texture remained uneven and creasy. It stood in sharp contrast with the stripes of undamaged and untanned skin on his temples, which he usually hid under the gauze bandage. His eyelashes grew a little longer, but they were still misshapen and curled into tufts.
The bitter regret rose to Yugo’s throat, making it spasm.
Kuon stirred. A look of uneasiness hardened his jaw. His expression darkened, and he jerked upright, eyes scrunched up. His canine tooth bit his tormented bottom lip as he held out his hand. “I’ll manage; just give me the drops.”
Yugo tsked, realizing he’d stared for too long. He stroked the slowly healing skin beneath Kuon’s eye with the back of his finger and planted a light kiss beside it. “Don’t be silly.”
Eyes flickering behind the scarred lids, Kuon dropped his chin, helpless and lost. He opened his mouth to speak but closed it in resignation.
Yugo wanted to push him down and kiss those swollenlips again until his lover lost the ability to think, but he had already done so. It didn’t work for long. With a sigh, he got up and turned off the wall sconces at the sides of the bed, leaving a distant night lamp next to the fireplace as the only source of light. That and the soft late summer sun filtering through the gaps in the curtains. “You can open your eyes now.”
Short eyelashes fluttered open, only to close again in an instant. The edges of Kuon’s eyes grew wet; glittering droplets swelled on his lashes. “I can’t. It burns.”
“Try again? Can you see me?” Yugo inched closer, holding back his breath.
Kuon obeyed, but the struggle left him with wet trails on his cheeks. “Not really. It’s blurry, and my eyes feel gritty. I see light streaks and shadows, but even they are unclear.”
Trying not to let the disappointment that thickened the air control his voice, Yugo took a small medical kit from the nightstand and set it on the bed. He extracted a tiny squeeze bottle and pulled Kuon closer.
“Try to open your eyes again.” His fingers sinking into the chestnut hair, Yugo gently tilted Kuon’s head back and squeezed the dropper between his thumb and forefinger. Two clear drops hit the narrow slit of Kuon’s eye, then the other.
Kuon blinked. The excessive liquid, mixing with his tears, painted more shimmering paths over his temples.
