Page 79 of The Murder Between Us
Noah held him and held him in the airport lobby, his strangled, smothered whimpers falling into Cole’s ear. He hid his face beneath the rim of his ball cap until Cole tipped up his chin. “I’ll be back,” he said. “I already have my ticket.”
“I know.” Noah took his hand. Squeezed. His grip strength was coming back. “I just don’t want to be without you, even for one day. I’m a greedy man.”
“Call me,” Cole said. “I don’t care what time it is. Call me when you have nightmares. I’m here for you.”
Noah nodded. He stared at Cole. Fidgeted. Blinked fast. Cole waited. Noah was not a man to be rushed, ever. If he was working up to something, he’d take his time, maybe even a geological epoch—
“I love you,” Noah blurted out. “I love you, Cole.”
In front of God and the Des Moines International Airport. Cole’s jaw dropped, but he recovered quickly, hauling Noah into his arms and squeezing him tight. “I love you, too,” he breathed. “I love you, too, Noah. More than you can possibly know.”
He cried as the plane took off, and he didn’t stop until they were over Ohio. He kept turning on his cell phone, staring at the picture of Noah he’d made his phone background.I love you.
He had to cancel his next weekend trip to Des Moines when his boss sent him on an emergency flight to Los Angeles. And then the weekend after that, when he was in Boise on a domestic terrorism emergency negotiation.
Instead of being together, he called Noah and Katie every chance he could. They ate dinner—takeout—via video call, and he listened to Katie’s long diatribes about summer school, her pre-calc homework, cheerleading practice, and the idiot football players. Later, he and Noah stayed on the phone until they almost fell asleep, talking quietly as the hours bled away. Noah was back at work, no longer the acting special agent in charge of Des Moines but now officially the new SAC. And while Cole was being worked to the bone, Noah and his team were enjoying a lull in crime in the Des Moines metro area. It was nice, Noah said, to have time to breathe.
The day before Katie’s school started, Cole got a video message from Jacob. Cole was in Atlanta, helping the local police department, and he ducked out to the stairwell to watch.
The video opened on Jacob, Noah, and Katie out at lunch, eating on a patio somewhere sunny and bright. Noah was flushed and embarrassed, Katie was laughing and hanging on to his shoulders, and Jacob held the camera, ducking his face into the frame. “Hey, Cole! Just wanted to give you a shout-out. I’ve been hearing so much about you recently—Cole this and Cole that and Cole is wonderful and Cole is everything I ever wanted and Cole is perfect, blah blah—but you haven’t come in to see me! Hardly what I call perfect and wonderful! What gives, man? Next time you’re in town, come on down to the office. I still need to take you out. You gotta need a break from this guy.” He jerked his thumb at Noah, rolling his eyes exaggeratedly. “So come say hi, man.”
“Come baaack,” Katie called to the screen. “We miss you!”
Through it all, Noah was staring at the camera lens, embarrassed and blushing and trying to hide his smile behind his hands, but there was so much love in his gaze that it made Cole’s heart ache.
“Oh, I almost forgot.” Jacob pulled a small envelope out of his pocket. He passed it to Noah and winked at the camera. “I got you something. A congrats on your promotion.”
Noah ripped open the envelope, and a rainbow lanyard, identical to the one Cole wore, tumbled into his palm. Katie laughed. Noah’s blush got impossibly darker. Jacob beamed, mugging for the camera. “Now you guys can match!” He reached across the table, his massive bear paw gripping the back of Noah’s neck for a moment. The camera went wonky, then straightened. “Seriously, Cole, can’t wait to see you again. Don’t be a stranger.” Katie waved manically in the background. Noah kept staring at him, fingering the rainbow lanyard, a thousand watts of love pouring from his eyes.
The video ended.
In the stairwell of the Atlanta police department, all alone, Cole fell to his knees and wept.
* * *
He madeit to Katie’s first football game to watch her cheer but almost fell asleep in the stands. Noah prodded him awake, let him sleep on the drive home, and then made breakfast Saturday morning. Instead of the French toast Cole usually made, he cobbled together microwave cinnamon buns. Katie barely noticed the difference, keeping up a running commentary about all the things Cole had missed, every minute detail of her life at school since the year had begun. Noah held his hand through the entire monologue and kissed him when Katie disappeared to shower. “You’re a trooper.”
He wanted to go back to sleep, pull Noah into bed with him, wake up sometime in the afternoon and make love to him, then go back to sleep again. But Katie had made plans for them all to go roller skating, so he saddled up and off they went. Noah held his hand around the rink, and later, after Katie finally went to bed, he seduced Cole in the best, most delicious way.
Hours later, Cole’s toes were still curled, and he was trying to remember how to breathe as Noah pressed his warm lips to Cole’s cheek and smiled. “Good?”
“Good? I can barely remember my own name.”
“Mm, so I need to work harder. Get you to forget even that.”
“I may die.” He rolled over, pulling Noah close. He nuzzled his face, kissed his nose. “I love you.”
“I love you.” Noah lost his playful edge, suddenly going serious. “I do want to be good for you. You’re more experienced than I am, and I don’t want you to get bored—”
Cole rolled Noah to his back, straddling him and capturing him in his arms. Their faces were microns apart, lips touching. “Never,” Cole breathed. “Never, ever, ever. You’re perfect for me. Exactly as you are. You’re everything I want, Noah. Imeanthat.”
Noah made a face. “I’ve complicated your life. By a lot. I have a lot of baggage.” He still called Cole two or three nights a week, coming down from a nightmare. “And I have a very needy daughter. I think she wants to steal you away from me.”
Cole laughed. “I never thought I could make someone that happy just by showing up.”
“I’ve never seen her like this. She’s so happy, Cole.” Noah ran his hands through Cole’s hair, fingers massaging Cole’s scalp. “I’ve never been this happy in my life.”
“Neither have I.” He kissed Noah slowly, and then not slowly, and even though Noah had just rocked his world to the core, he rose to the occasion and they made love once more, until Noah was screaming his name into the pillow and Cole was draped over his back, cursing and praying and kissing Noah’s shoulder blades as he told Noah he loved him, over and over again.
