Page 21 of Playing Dirty
I stared out the windshield for a long stretch, watching the snowy blur roll by. Then I finally asked, “Were you serious earlier? About being disappointed?”
Rhett’s fingers tapped once against the steering wheel. He didn’t answer right away. Just exhaled and kept his eyes on the road.
“Yeah,” he said finally. “I don’t like seeing you shrink to fit someone else’s idea of enough.”
The words stung, even though he said them softly, maybe because he did.
I looked down at Pixie, who shifted and sighed like she agreed with Rhett. My arms tightened around her instinctively.
“I’m not trying to shrink,” I muttered.
“I know. That’s the part that makes it harder to watch.”
I turned my face to the window, not wanting him to see the way my jaw clenched, the way my throat pulled tight around the lump growing there. The silence filled in again, but it was sharper now, edged with everything I couldn’t quite say.
Then Rhett’s voice cut through—quieter this time. Gentler. “But I’m still here. So maybe I still believe you’ll find your way back.”
That did it. The lump turned liquid, and my eyes burned. I blinked fast, refusing to let tears fall. Not here. Not now.
“I don’t know who I am anymore,” I whispered, barely loud enough to hear myself.
He didn’t hesitate. “Then start figuring it out.”
No rescue. No advice. Just that steady, unshakable presence.
Tessa’s house was loud in the best kind of way. Warmth pulsed from the big stone fireplace in the living room, laughter bounced down the hall, and the twins were already squealing over Pixie like they’d just unwrapped a birthday present with claws. She was not impressed. She took one look at the chaos, shot me a betrayed glare, and bolted under the couch like she had pressing business elsewhere.
“I told them to be gentle,” Tessa said, trying to grab a twin on the run while handing me a mug. “Better grab some of Mom’s homemade cocoa while there’s still some left.”
The mug was warm in my hands. Real cocoa. Whipped cream. Marshmallows. It almost made me cry.
Dalia leaned in from the kitchen, grinning. “What’ve you been up to, girl? I sure have missed you since I moved over here to Colt and Tessa’s place.”
“I’ve missed you, too. I hear you’ve been busy spoiling the twins,” I smiled, trying to keep my voice cheerful.
Behind me, Rhett shifted near the door. I turned, but he was already pulling his jacket tighter, the tension in his shoulders back in full force.
“You’re not staying?” I asked, even though I already knew.
He shook his head once. “You’re safe here. That’s enough.”
I stood in the middle of all that life—fire crackling, cocoa in my hands, one twin on all fours staring under the couch, trying to coax out the cat, and felt a strange kind of ache settle in.
Not regret exactly. Just… wondering.
I could’ve had this.
Maybe I still could.
If only I’d seen the warning signs with Matt sooner. If only I hadn’t tried to fix something that never deserved the effort.
Tessa tossed me a soft look as she gathered up a discarded sippy cup. “It’s good to have you here.”
I nodded, letting the cocoa warm more than just my hands.
Itwasgood to be here. Yet it also made me realize how far from home I’d actually wandered.
Chapter Seven
