Page 79 of Heartfelt Pain
He reaches out a hand to touch me. I step back and the limb falls uselessly to his side. “Whether you like it or not, hellcat, I’m your person.”
My head hurts from frowning so hard. “What the hell are you talking about?”
He acts like it’s so easy. Like we can pick up right where we left off.
But I’m the one who ended up shattered. Ipicked up the pieces of my glass heart. And when I couldn’t repair it, I just moved on without it.
Heartless Ren, right? The girl who only cares about making money and doesn’t care about taking care of herself. Abe said I hadn’t lived since Cliff died.
It hits me then. How fucked up my life became because of Roma Zimin.
“I killed my cousin because of you.”
Roma jerks back. The words shoot through his quiet confidence. His eyes widen and he staggers. “I. . .”
“This isn’t a fairy tale,” I tell him, my arms still crossed. “It’s a fucked up, messy hook up and it ends now. I had my fun. You had your. . . whatever the fuck that was tonight.”
His jaw tenses, a blush creeping over his cheeks. “You gonna pretend like you didn’t like that?”
I clutch at my robe. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed but I’m not one to be bossed around anymore.”
His chest wracks with laughter and he runs a hand through his dark locks. “I don’t mind you being bossy, hellcat. I’m man enough to admit it’s a turn on. But there’s going to be more give and take in the future.”
I wrinkle my nose. “There is no future.”
“Things got real fucked up with us last time. But there’s no one else, hellcat. And deep down you know it too.”
“Nice try with the gaslighting.” I point to the door. “Go.”
He grabs his jacket. “Make sure you drink the water.”
“Oh, fuck off.” I’m on his heels, ready to slam the door shut behind him.
But when he opens the door, Ben stands there, one arm raised, ready to knock.
Roma’s hand is still on the door handle. I don’t think Ben’s ever stood so close to him. He knows who Roma is of course, but he arrived in New York after everything had gone down.
The spot I’m standing in gives me the perfect vantage point for watching disbelief sweep over my cousin’s face. Then he steels himself up, the lawyer in him, snapping to attention. He meets my eye a second later.
I’m dressed in a robe. My ex-boyfriend is leaving my apartment. It’s not hard to put two and two together.
Roma nods and Ben takes one step back so he can pass by.
It’s unnervingly quiet in my apartment until Ben asks, “Can I come in?”
I nod, pulling at my robe and pretending like he doesn’t inspect my apartment as he closes the door.
“I thought you were joking about Trevino cleaning your dishes for you.” He clears his throat. I’ve seen mafia men look less tense than my cousin.
I stand there, wiping my eyes.
“Abe told me about what happened. I wanted to come check in on you.” He glances at the door, remembering who just left. “I’m not sure how worried I should be right now.”
The living room lights hurt my head.
“Ren. . .”
“It’s fine. I’m not?—”
