Page 59 of Keep My Heart
‘I don’t think he’ll do it if I tell him that. He doesn’t want this turning into anything.’
‘Then don’t do it. Lying about what you’re doing isn’t fair to either of you and will definitely end with one or both of you getting hurt.’
I sigh. ‘I need to think about this.’
‘Let’s plan our girls’ night for next week, once Nick is gone.’
‘Sorry. I’m not being a very good friend.’
‘You’re a great friend. You’re just going through a tough time. You need to do what you need to do. I get that. I’m here if you need me, okay?’
‘Yeah. Thanks, Diane. I’ll let you know what happens.’
There’s a knock on my door. ‘Honey, are you in there?’
‘Yeah, Mom. Just a minute.’ I get up and open the door. ‘Your hair looks nice.’
She’s had the same hairstyle for as long as I can remember, a short bob that she curls under at the ends.
‘Thank you.’ She smooths her hand over it. ‘It always feels good to get it trimmed up. Did Nick leave?’
‘Yeah, he’s with his brothers and his cousins from Chicago. They’ll all be going to the party soon.’
‘He’s such a nice young man.’ She smiles. ‘And he seems to think an awful lot of you. The way he was looking at you?’ She winks at me.
‘We’re just friends, Mom.’ I walk over to the mirror above my dresser to check that my mascara didn’t smear when I was tearing up. I don’t want my mom knowing I was crying and asking why. ‘Besides, I thought you were still holding out hope that I’d get back with Chris.’
‘Honey, I know it’s over between you two,’ she says, coming into my room. ‘I was hoping you two might be able to reconcile, but now that the divorce is final, I think it’s time for you to find someone else.’
‘I’m not sure I’m ready for that.’ I turn to face her. ‘Dating. Getting into another relationship.’
‘You’re not getting any younger, and if you want children—’
‘Yeah, Mom, I know.’
I don’t need a reminder of how old I’m getting and how my time’s running out to have kids. I already think about that all that time. It’s the reason I need to force myself to start dating again. So maybe I shouldn’t be pursuing anything with Nick. Maybe my time should be spent getting back out there, finding someone I could actually date and maybe marry. I wish that guy could be Nick, but it’s not, and never will be.
Chapter 14
Nick
The party’s been going on for a few hours now and my mom’s had a smile on her face the entire time. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her this happy, or this in love with my dad. When he walked her into the barn and she saw us all there, her jaw dropped. She was stunned and overwhelmed, and probably wondering how my dad pulled this off.
We all stayed quiet, waiting for her to say something. But she didn’t, not right away. Instead, she slowly looked around the barn, at the long tables that were set up with white tablecloths and white wooden folding chairs. Dad put wildflowers—my mom’s favorite—down the center of each table and hung white lights from the wood beams along the ceiling. He put lanterns around the perimeter of the room for extra light. The barn has electricity, but Dad was going for mood lighting. He wanted the space to feel romantic and special.
When Mom was done checking it out, she turned to Dad, took his face in her hands, and kissed him. My brothers hooted and hollered like idiots, ruining the moment, but Mom just laughed.Austin’s band started playing Mom’s favorite song—a slow country song—and Dad took her hand and led her to the dance floor.
We all watched as they danced. They didn’t take their eyes off each other. It was then that I knew how completely and totally in love they were. I’d never really thought about it before. I knew they were in love, but it didn’t seem like anything special. They held hands sometimes and gave each other the occasional peck on the cheek, but other than that, they reserved affection for when they were alone together. And I never saw them look at each other the way they did tonight. Or maybe they did and I just didn’t notice.
‘You seem lost in your thoughts,’ Nash says, coming up beside me as I watch Dad serve Mom a piece of cake. ‘You thinking about that girl?’
‘No,’ I say, but I actually was thinking about Lyndsay, and about what she said when I dropped her off. She’s right. Our fake dates aren’t feeling so fake anymore. I tried to keep my feelings out of it, but I couldn’t. The crush I had on Lyndsay 15 years ago is still there, except now it’s becoming more than a crush. I’m developing real feelings for her and it needs to stop.
‘So there’s nothing going on with you two?’ Nash asks.
‘She’s just a friend.’
He laughs a little. ‘So was Callie, and now I’m engaged to her.’
