Page 103 of Never Tear Us Apart
‘I miss Daddy, too,’ David says. ‘I miss playing horses. He would let me ride his neck.’
‘He would.’ Stella smiles. ‘He was very proud of you.’
‘That’s the thing, isn’t it?’ Christina says. ‘If I were the only woman to lose the man she loves in this war then I could feel sorry for myself, wring my hands and beat my head against the floor. But I am just one – one of millions. What does my heart matter in the midst of all this?’
‘It matters,’ I tell her. ‘Every heart matters. That’s the point. If we don’t acknowledge that every life, every heart, is just as important as all the others, if we start to see peopleas numbers too vast to imagine, then we’ve lost. Every heart matters, Christina. Every loss must be felt.’
‘I suppose you are right,’ Christina says, burying her face in her hands. ‘I just don’t know what to do, how to go from one moment to the next.’
‘Stay here,’ Stella tells her. ‘Go and catalogue what supplies we have left. Write an inventory and pack my medical bag. The skies are too quiet – I don’t like it.’
‘Thank you,’ Christina says, flinging her arms around Stella and holding her tight. ‘Thank you, Stella. I’ll start right away.’
‘I can help,’ David says. ‘I can read.’
‘Yes, you come and help me.’ Christina offers him her hand. ‘And while we work, you can tell me everything you remember about your daddy. How does that sound?’
‘OK!’ David hops to pick up the model plane from the floor and runs after Christina, who is unlocking the medical room door and heading down the corridor.
‘You saw your flight lieutenant?’ Stella asks me. Taking my chin between her finger and thumb, she tilts my face left to right. ‘You did. I see he didn’t shave today.’ She smiles. ‘You are happy, Maia,’ she says then. ‘Being in love suits you.’
‘It frightens me, too,’ I say. ‘Like you say, something’s coming. Something big. Stella, when it comes, will you do something for me?’
‘What can I do for you, Maia?’ Stella asks.
‘Will you stay safe, with the children? Go to a shelter and stay there. Will you leave this battle to everyone else for once?’
Stella cups my cheeks with her hands and kisses me gently on the forehead. ‘Oh, no, Maia. You know I can’t do that. I never leave the fate of my country to be decided by others. Our fight is our freedom, Maia. I will never hide from that.’
I knew that was what she was going to say. But I hoped it might be that easy. Now, fear and death seem very close by. Warby’s gone, and Christina’s heartbroken. Nicco is in jail awaiting trial, and the sky is holding its breath.
It’s down to me to try now, and I’m so afraid I’m not brave or strong enough.
The bell on the medical room rings, and my mouth drops open.
It’s Sal standing in the doorway.
Chapter Seventy-Three
‘Sal, what happened?’ I ask as soon as we are alone.
‘Let’s walk and find a place to talk.’ Sal leads us out of Floriana and towards home. The streets seem quieter than usual. People go about their daily lives as always, but they are quieter, as if they sense the storm building out at sea and are waiting for it to break.
Sal comes to a stop just shy of the street where the half-house is. Looking around, he sees an abandoned shop and ushers me in. Its front shutters and door stand open deliberately to reveal that the shelves are empty of anything worth stealing.
Going in first, I step over broken glass and empty wooden crates to find my way to a small back room with a narrow, barred window. Every surface is covered in dust; a broken sink hangs off the wall.
‘Tell me.’
Sal sees an old stool in the corner and, drawing it to him, sits on it. He stares into a shaft of steep light that cuts through the gloom to reveal a million particles of dust dancing in the air.
‘It didn’t work?’ I ask.
‘It didn’t work.’ Sal lowers his eyes. ‘Not as it should. I should have woken up there. In the bed, just as you have described. But that is not how it was.’
‘Then, what happened?’
‘I remembered the directions you gave me to the hospital,’ Sal says. ‘So much has changed. So many more buildingsand people and cars – so many cars. Even more than in the nineties. I thought your time wouldn’t be so very hard for me to understand, but I suppose I have grown used to a quiet time, at least before the raids started. Everything was so loud.’
