Page 15 of Fated Unkindness
“I would never hurt you like that.” His brows crease and his gaze flicks between my eyes like he is searching for something behind them. Dax and I haven’t talked about the night that Mel was abducted. Whatever was happening between us, if anything. Cano liked to surmise we were a couple, but warming each other’s beds didn't entail a relationship. I also didn’t feel the need to deny anything, because well, it’s not anyone's business. Since that night though, I’ve felt a pull toward Dax. But he’s pushed me away since the day I arrived in Ravendene. Recently though, I feel like something is shifting in him.
“I know.” Because I do. I’ve sensed that from him since the moment I met him. I could tell all of his asshole exterior was a ruse. The man who stands before me is a good man at the core, but something has got him trapped in the clutches of despair. He believes that he doesn’t deserve happiness and the guilt of what’s happened with Mel is making it worse. My chest hums as I reach out, capturing his hand in mine. “Thank you, for stepping in back there. I was only trying to help. Cano… something has gotten into him lately,” I shake my head as I move to drop his hand, but his grip tightens just enough to keep me there.
“Raelle, Cano has been changing for years. Don’t think that any of this is your doing. It’s not.” He pushes his other hand into his pocket, steering his gaze back to the water in front of us. The sundips below the treeline, darkening the mountains on the horizon with shadows, the last of the sun’s warm light leaves the sky painted in pink and orange tones that reflect in the motionless water. I see why this place is somewhere Dax likes to come to calm down. “I appreciate you wanting to help, but after witnessing what just happened back there?” He shakes his head before turning his gaze back to me. “I need you to stay out of it, Raelle. I will work on Cano. One way or another I'm going to get my baby sister back.” His promise is firm, and his thumb strikes a line across the back of my hand sending warmness through me.
“I’m sorry Dax. You have to know I am. If it were up to me we would have left right away looking for her. If it were my brother…” I trail off and Dax cranes his neck in my direction, his arm brushes my shoulder.
“I know, Rae.” his shoulders drop a fraction as he takes a deep breath. “I know.”
Tonight when I lay in my bed my mind can't seem to find rest. The constant thoughts of finding Melani dig at me and my brain won't calm, bringing me to toss and turn. All the feelings of my own family surface and the overwhelming sadness I feel for not havingthem in my life anymore. We have to do something to find Mel, I don't want Dax and Trent to feel this pain I do for their sister. They already lost their parents.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath, letting it out in a long puff of my cheeks. I roll over covering my head with my pillow. After what feels like hours I finally drift off but the thoughts of my loss heavy on my mind bring nightmares.
I look down at the letter in my lap. Teardrops dot the page and smear the ink. My family is dead. My mother, father, and brother—all gone from my life in the blink of an eye. My hands are trembling, my stomach rolls, and I run from the training center. As soon as I break the tree line I lose my dinner. This can’t be happening. They can’treallybe gone. I move to a large pine and sink to the ground resting against the rough bark. Pine needles find their way through the fabric of my training gear and poke into my skin, but I am numb to the world surrounding me.
“Raelle?” Claire’s voice cuts through my racing thoughts and I look up to her. “Oh, Rae. What’s wrong?” she drops to her knees next to me, using her water element she wicks the wetness from my face. But I know the redness in my eyes isn’t something that can be fixed with Magic. My broken heart can’t be fixed with Magic.
“They’re all dead,” I say, my eyes fixed on nothing specific in the forest. “They are all dead.” I repeat under my breath.
“Oh my gods, who Raelle?” I push the letter into her hands. Her eyes scan the words and then well up with tears. She doesn’t say anything more. No more questions. Instead, she pulls my body to her and crushes me into her small frame. The gesture sends another wave of grief through me. I shudder and sob into my friend's shoulder, breaking further at the news I just received.
Claire is silent as we walk. She doesn’t need to say anything because there is nothing to say. I look around as we make our way back to the training center, trying to process all of my thoughts, my eyebrows furrow, confusion setting in after the initial shock.
“Why were they in Castenelle?” I whisper mostly to myself.
“What do you mean?” Claire asks.
“Why were they in Castenelle? They were meant to be traveling to Loema, that’s what my mother told me. She had a meeting there. Why were they past Loema in Castenelle?” It doesn't make sense. They would have had to travel straight through Loema to get there. If the timeline is right, they couldn't have stopped in Loema at all. My mother wouldn't have lied to me. What happened to make them change course?” Claire doesn't answer my question outright and that's okay because it was more rhetorical than anything. She can't know the answer, but I plan to find out. There has to be more information than what this letter is giving me.
I pause at the door when we reach the training dorms, my hand resting on the handle. Claire meets my gaze and she sees the goodbye I’m about to give her. In the short amount of time that we have known each other, she has become a close friend. Well, my only friend. Growing up in the rural countryside of Ravendene didn't give me much opportunity to make friendships. After begging and finally convincing my parents to allow me to begin formal combat training, something that most start younger than myself, they agreed to let me attend. This is the first time as far back as I can remember, I was able to make a friend.
“I have to find out what happened to them. This letter,” I lift the paper. “it’s too vague. Something feels off to me. I want to find out what they were doing in Castenelle.” Claire gives me a tight-lipped smile and pulls me into an embrace once more. Saying goodbye to her makes me feel even more alone and tears mark paths along my cheeks once more.
“It's ok Raelle, just know that you will always have a place at my side. Find the answers you need and then come back, train, and prepare for your ascension. I’m so sorry about your family.” She steps back looking at my face once more, her smile is warm but her eyes show the pity she feels for me, sending a wave of nausea through me again.
“Thank you, Claire, I'll reach out when I get back to Lesa.” Her eyebrows stitch together as she smiles again then turns away, back to the training center. Leaving me truly alone.
Chapter thirteen
THREE WEEKS AGO
Time has dragged sinceMel was taken. Cano returned the morning after the abduction. Every day since, the tension has been building through all of Ravendene. Dax has been beside himself with worry. Though, to most, he just seems more of an asshole than usual. The anger is almost a tangible entity surrounding him. I see through that, though. I know it too well myself. I wish there was something I could do for him, for Trent. At every opportunity, I mention as much to Cano. I know that Dax has been trying to get a sanctioned search party together, but Cano will not allow it, saying that it’s too dangerous and we don’t have the numbers.We can’t risk the fallout of losing men, which is always his rebuttal. Dax asked me to stay out of it. I’m not sure I can.
I understand both sides in a way. I know we need to be smart about our numbers with the constant threat of Demetrey pushing against our territory. They want our land and our people, and we cannot allow that to happen at any cost. However, Mel was—is one of our people, and she’s not just anyone. She’s the sister to one of the pillars of Ravendene. Dax and even Trent play a huge role in keeping our community safe and running.
The Fornax siblings have been in my thoughts so much lately, but every night when I lay down to sleep, that night at the Fornax estate plays on repeat in my mind. I tell myself it is my subconscious analyzing everything that led up to when we heard the scream. We need to find Mel. However, I find myself lingering on what happened between myself and Dax. The warmth of his hand splayed across my stomach. The tickle of his lips brushing the shell of my ear as he whispered into it, the fire burning in his hazel green eyes. The scent of whiskey and cedar stuck to me for days after our brief contact. I don’t know what had gotten into me, and we still haven’t talked about it. Not with the situation that developed with Mel, it’s not the time to. Trent hasn’t mentioned what he walked in on either. I’m relieved because I don’t even know what I would say. What would have happened if Trent hadn’t walked in on that intense moment between us? Cano has been acting strangely since he returned also, but with all the tension in the air… I guess it’s to be expected as the leader of the territory.
Dax is right, though. We need to find Mel. I know that he’s been trying to get Cano to approve the mission, but he’s not budging, and Dax is growing more impatient by the day. Training hasbecome so intense that the other members of the guard are growing tired. The whole situation is causing mass unrest. Cano must see that too. It’s something we don’t need happening right now, not so close to the total eclipse. An event with so much natural power, we need to be ready for an attack when it comes. All this back and forth between Cano and Dax needs to stop so we can focus on our training and prepare the territory for something that could happen. There is potential for such a large power surge. They are blind to everything that is going on around them because they are too focused on themselves. There are so many problems that’ll no doubt come along with it if there is a surge.
I’m tucked in a chair in the far corner of the library, in the square where Cano conducts most of his business. He and I were planning to meet for a late lunch, but yet again, his business took him elsewhere. This time I don’t seek him out. Since he attacked me in the training center, we have only talked on a few occasions, mostly in passing. I asked for this lunch. I figured he would have another excuse not to make it. His news came right when lunch was served. Flynn just left. So, I came to the only place where I can feel respite from my feelings and wondering of my mind. I’ve just finishedeating, curled up with a blanket, and one of my favorite books when the double doors at the entrance burst open forcefully. Dax storms into the space. Each step he takes is like a thunderclap to my awareness.
The fire that was dwindling down suddenly roars, tripling in size. No doubt it’s a surge from his emotions causing the fire to amplify with his ability to wield it, but it’s not the fire causing the heat to rush up my neck from my chest and into my cheeks. I feel a tingling sensation in my toes that makes them curl. Dax doesn’t notice me sitting here though. I read the look on his face as he stomps his heavy boots across the dark wood floors of the library. His shoulders are rigid with tension. Lines bracket his mouth, and a deep furrow is carved at his brow. There is no doubt in my mind that he’s had another unsuccessful meeting with Cano.
My heart squeezes for him, and the anguish I see on his face. He doesn’t allow others to see such emotions from him. Typically, he is only showing a pissed-off, controlled anger or nothing at all. Since the abduction of Mel, though, his controlled anger has developed into something bigger. Right now, when he is believed to be alone, I see it, and it cracks something inside of me. Because I recognize that anguish. I’ve lived it almost every day since I lost my own family. Dax moves over to the small bar by one of the beautiful arched windows and pours himself a measure of whiskey. He tugs his free hand through his shaggy, dark hair and rips his hand away with a growl of frustration, causing some of the hair to fall forward into his eyes that are now closed. As he lifts his chin to the sky, it appears as though he is in a silent prayer to the stars.
I feel uncomfortable not making myself known while he is having such a private moment. So, I shift, sitting up slightly, andclear my throat. The action does what I’d hoped, and Dax turns swiftly toward me. Our eyes meet, but before he shuts down all that emotion rolling through him, I see it. Dax’s eyes were almost lit from behind. His normally hazel-green eyes are like molten copper. It stunned me, but I didn’t react. Instead, I focus on the intensity of his stare and his posture.
“Raelle? I—What are you doing here?” He growls, but he doesn’t come any closer; his shoulders are stiff, and his feet are planted where he stands.
