Page 86 of Honeysuckle
“Why are you being so nice to me?” I asked, sitting up on the bed, curling my knees up and took the bowl from him as I scooted back against the wall.
“If you think this is nice, we have some work to do,” he said, and I heard myself in his voice. That day at camp. I was being such an idiot.
“I can’t eat that, even the thought of it is making my stomach turn,” I admitted. Josh nodded, grabbing the bowl without a word and disappeared.Fuck.
I hadn’t meant to upset him, I just…
I curled my legs up and let my head fall against the wall behind me. I was fucking everything up, and now Logan was even fed up with my shit. I heard a small creak in the floorboards, and his voice made me open my eyes.
“What about now?” He asked, and when I looked down at what he had in his hand, a small smile formed on my lips.
“Ice cream?” I said, taking the bowl from him. It was exactly how I had made it the other night, right down to the syrup.
“Eat.” That was all I got in return as he lowered to the floor beside the bed. I held the bowl in my hand, staring at the sprinkles like they’d somehow have the answers to all life's questions, but I was only met with silence.
“The first time I had ice cream was last week,” Josh said, and I looked over at him.
“What?” The confusion was raw because Josh chuckled and looked back at me.
“Yeah.” He shrugged. "I was scared you were going to ask for my favorite flavor that day.”
There was something so innocent in the confession, the way his eyes drifted to the floor and his shoulders relaxed forward.
“Because I don’t have one, I guess vanilla if I had to pick, but only because it’s a flavor, not because I actually know if it’s my favorite.” He played with the fabric of my comforter. “But I definitely don’t like chocolate syrup,” he said, and I huffed a little laugh out, one that after two weeks finally felt genuine.
“That’s because you hate fun,” I said with a small smile.
“We just couldn’t afford stuff like that, ice cream is a luxury,” he said and I understood where he was coming from but it didn’t make me less sad for him.
“Want to share?” I asked, mostly because I couldn’t fathom eating this much alone. “I’ll eat off all the syrup,” I added.
Josh looked back at me, pushing off the floor and climbing into the bed. Keeping his distance, he curled one of his legs up and held out his hand for the bowl. “Bite for bite, you aren’t getting out of eating it,” he warned.
“Deal,” I said, watching him press the spoon between his lips. “Can I ask you something?” I took the bowl back and he waited to answer me until I took a bite of the ice cream.
Satisfied with my spoonful, he nodded.
“Why did you…” I stopped. I hated how easily I lost my nerve around him. “Why were you so nice to me today?” I asked, my voice quieter than usual.
“For the same reason you came to find me,” he answered. “I needed it.”
Needed it.
It felt like such a heavy statement from Josh.
But he wasn’t wrong, I had needed it. Neededhim.
I came home and all the noise had just been too much, but it was like my subconscious knew where he’d be and the next thing I knew I was standing in the steamed up bathroom asking to get into the shower like some lost puppy.
Josh took another bite of ice cream, never breaking eye contact with me.
“What are we doing?” I asked him, and took the bowl back.
“Eating ice cream,” he said, like it was the only correct answer.
“No, I mean…like us.” I took another nervous bite.
“You have enough going on in your life to figure out without trying to dissect whatever the hell this is, Tuck. Why don’t you just eat your ice cream and shut up,” Josh suggested.
