Page 111 of Just (Fake) Married
“Then enlighten me,” he said.
“Look,” I said. “This isn’t love. This is two people making the best of a strange situation for a while.”
As the words came out of my mouth, they tasted bad. The strange situation was our marriage.
And I was lucky she was the one I was doing this with. Our chemistry together…that was just an accident. An amazing accident.
“You shouldn’t disrespect her,” Carter said. “When you’re gone, people in this town will talk.”
I rolled my eyes. “For shit’s sake, what century are we in?”
“Listen here, city boy,” Carter said, getting in my face. “You don’t like it here, a fact you’ve made abundantly clear your whole life. But when this thing falls apart, people are going to be disappointed. And if Harmony’s walking around town with a broken heart, then that’s just one more McGraw in the history of the McGraws to fuck over the Calloways.”
“That’s not what’s happening,” I said, my voice getting low.
“No? Because for the guy who didn’t want to be like Dad, you’re kind of turning out to be a lot like him.”
The whole world went red and white hot. Leave it to my brother to hit the nuclear button. “What exactly are you mad about? That I’m having sex and you’re not?”
He grabbed me by my shirt and shoved me against the saddles.
“I don’t remember you tossing your dick into the coffin with Lilly. I get that you miss her, man. But she’s dead, and you’re alive.” I said. “Maybe start acting like it.”
For a second, I thought he was going to punch me. And for sure I deserved it, but someone had to remind this guy he wasn’t dead.
Carter just shook his head, disappointment written all over his face.
What was it about me and my family? I was doomed to fail in their eyes, no matter what I did.
“I should have been the one to marry Harmony. At least we understand each other.” Carter gave me one final shake before letting me go. “She deserves someone better. At least someone who wants to stick around.”
That stung. Because it was the truth. She did deserve that. Harmony deserved better than a fake marriage, even if she put her hand up for it. She deserved someone who loved her and who would love this town as much as she did. Someone who would give her everything she wanted.
Babies. A family. A future.
A guy like Carter.
Jealousy, unlike anything I’d ever felt, sucker punched me hard in the gut, harder than Carter ever could.
Tag came into the tack room and stopped when he saw us.
“Well,” he said, leaning against the door frame. “It’s like Saturday morning from twenty years ago. You boys getting into some trouble?”
“No,” I said, at the same time Carter said “Yes.”
I rolled my eyes at him and Carter didn’t smile, but Tag did.
“You going to help us?” I asked, wiping the neatsfoot oil and the cloth over the second saddle.
“Nah,” he said. “This is way below my pay grade. Need to talk about how many hands we can afford to hire for calving season. We’re counting down the weeks at this point. Are we counting you in, Ethan?”
“No,” Carter answered for me, as he made his way out of the tack room. “Even if he is around, he can’t hurt his precious hands to help us.”
“Fuck you,” I spat at his back. “I’m a goddamn surgeon!”
And suddenly, I was eighteen years old all over again. Screaming at Dad and telling him why I was never going to be a cowboy. Feeling his judgement as if I’d told him I was going to be a circus clown instead.
I just didn’t expect that coming from Carter.
