Page 37 of After the Red Carpet
“Finn, we need to talk,” she said, pulling away from him. He looked at her curiously, and she gestured at the script.
“Did you get a chance to read it? What do you think?” he asked.
“I can’t believe you would agree to do this. You’re married. Didn’t you think of that at all? Didn’t you think about how this would make me feel?”
“What are you talking about?” he asked, looking bewildered.
“All the sex and kissing,” she said quietly, as if she were embarrassed to say it out loud.
“Ella . . .” he muttered, nearly breaking out into laughter. “You can’t be serious.”
“Don’t do that. Don’t act like it’s nothing. How do you think that makes me feel? The opening scene is you having steamy sex with another woman. Touching another woman’s naked body, her touching you, kissing passionately. My God, she’s riding you with her bare breasts in your face!”
“It’s acting. There’s nothing the least bit sexy or romantic about it. You know how movies are filmed and what it’s really like.”
“What I know is that you and another woman will be more or less naked, touching each other, and kissing.Kissing, Finn.”
“It doesn’t mean anything,” he said dismissively.
“It does to me.”
“Sweetheart, you’re the only woman in the world that I want. You’re my one true love. Always. It’s just work.”
“But I’m telling you it hurts me.”
“Ella, I’m an actor. This isn’t new. Hell, we met on a film set,” he said with exasperation.
She sprang out of bed. “Yeah, and I told you back then that I wouldn’t be comfortable watching you be intimate with another woman, acting or not. You said you were glad I felt that way, that’s how it should be with people who love each other, and now . . .”
“What?”
“Now you agreed to do this without even considering my feelings.”
“Baby,” he said, getting out of bed and taking her hands, “please don’t turn this into something that it’s not. It’s a meaningless action movie with the meaningless proverbial eye candy sex scenes.”
“Exactly. That’s what hurts even more. It’s not like this is some great piece of cinematic art and the intimacy is integral to telling the story. You’re willing to hurt me for some stupid blockbuster you don’t even care about, for money. That’s so much worse,” she said.
“Please, baby,” Finn said, putting his arms around her. Ella held on to him as he rubbed her head. “The first time we kissed, I felt it in every part of my body. I still do, each time. A scripted kissing scene with an actress can’t touch what we have. Nothing can. Don’t give it another thought.”
She pulled back and looked deeply into his eyes. “How can you say that?” She gently ran her finger across his upper lip, following the curve, lingering on the soft raised spot in the center. “This is my favorite part of you,” she said, and she lightly pressed her mouth to his. “How could you ever put this part of yourself on someone else? You’re breaking my heart, Finn.”
“Ella, please. I’m an actor. That doesn’t change just because we’re married.”
“I thought everything changed when we got married. We promised to always put our relationship first.”
“Actors have love scenes all the time, and their partners understand. I never thought this would be an issue for you of all people. You’re usually so cool.” He shook his head like he was annoyed. “Let’s table this for now. I’m exhausted and you’re being . . .”
“What?” she asked defensively.
“You’re being totally unreasonable!” he snapped. “This is absurd. I’m a fucking actor. Get over it!”
She burst into tears and threw her face in her hands.
“Ella,” he said gently. He caressed her arms and said, “I’m sorry I shouted. I’m just tired.”
She looked at him through a film of tears. “You hurt me, Finn. You promised never to hurt me, and now you have done it without a single thought. What’s worst of all is you’re trying to make me feel crazy for it.”
“This seems so unlike you. Why are you being so emotional?”
