Page 84 of Switch!
I watch helplessly as Sarah walks away, resisting the urge to call out to her. I don’t want our story to end like this.
“Come on,” Trixie says, tugging on my arm. “You don’t need to be psychic to see what a mess you are right now. Or are you always that bad of a liar?”
“I’m a little off my game,” I admit.
“I’m not judging. I never met Caleb and I still got emotional. The truths that were spoken at the podium…”
Her chin begins to tremble. She’s here to support me and ended up sad. That’s no good. I try cheering her up by changing the subject.
“We need to work on our code words, by the way. It might make sense for you to be a witch, but why me? Shouldn’t I be a wizard instead?”
“Swizard?” Trixie says experimentally before shaking her head. “Or maybe swarlock? Nope. You have to be a witch. Sorry.” She’s tugs on my arm again. “Let’s get away from the crowds. I had a thought during the service that I want to run by you.”
We don’t have much privacy until we’re seated in the car. All around us, people are pulling out and getting in line for the funeral procession.
“What’s up?” I ask.
“It’s the memory thing,” Trixie says. “You were wondering why you don’t recognize any of Caleb’s relatives. I think it’s because you no longer have access to his brain. That’s where memories are stored, right?”
“But I still remember being him,” I reply. “I haven’t lost any of that.”
“Because those are your memories, not his. Let me ask you this: What was your favorite cereal when you were a kid?”
“Apple Jacks,” I say instantly. “Or maybe Froot Loops.”
“Okay. What was Caleb’s favorite?”
“I don’t know. When I was with him, his mom always bought Wheaties, because he was convinced that’s what athletes ate for breakfast.”
“And when he was little?”
I shake my head. “No idea.”
“But you would’ve been able to find out, right? When you were still in his body?”
“Yeah. I’d only have to wonder and the answer would come to me.”
“Because you were accessing his memories. Now you can’t. You can still remember things you learned while being him, like the photo of his aunt near your bedroom, but you can’t refresh yourself on details you forgot, like her name.”
“Huh.” I lean back and consider the idea. “What about me? I can still remember my entire life.”
“Maybe you have a connection to your original body.”
“If that’s true, then why can’t I feel it? Or hear Caleb’s thoughts, or at the very least, access the new memories he’s making?”
“Have you tried?”
We stare at each other. Then I lean back and close my eyes, attempting to connect with something. My original body, the soul inhabiting it, anything! All I detect are my own thoughts, so I open my eyes again.
“Nothing.”
Trixie hisses in frustration. “Too bad! That would have been exciting. I’m stumped. You shouldn’t be able to keep your old memories once you have a different brain. Head injuries have proven that. Unless that’s part of your power.”
“Maybe,” I say, rubbing my forehead wearily. “I wish I had my notebook.”
“You said it’s in Caleb’s closet, right?”
“Yup.”
