Page 256 of Burn Bright
“Yes,” she interjects.
“Yes?”
“I’ll walk it with you, Ben. Because…I really,reallylove you,” she says so softly. “And I know you’d do the same for me. You already have.” She hoists a finger. “But if I turn out to be the worst thing for you, then we reevaluate.”
“Okay.” I start to smile. “I can accept those terms, Fisher.” Because there is no way she’s been anything but good for me. It’sbeen so clear from the start. She’s been the one that’s helped me breathe. “But I should warn you,” I tell her.
“What?” she hesitates.
“I think you have healing hands.”
She rolls her eyes, her cheeks pinching as a smile forms. “I’d say you’re a dork, but you’re literally slouching and man-spreading like a jock.”
A laugh rumbles through me. Our smiles soften on each other, and I ask her, “Did you make a choice while I was gone? Do I have a rockstar girlfriend or a doctor girlfriend?”
She rests her cheek on the top of the seat near my forearm. “Which one are you hoping for?”
“Long-lasting girlfriend,” I say. “Into forever Harriet.”
“Fortunately for you, whether I become a rockstar girlfriend or a doctor girlfriend, I predict it’ll be long-lasting.”
I ease. “You think?”
“Yep.” She holds my gaze. “Which boyfriend am I getting?”
“Mentally unwell boyfriend. On the road to recovery boyfriend.”
“Into forever Ben?”
I nod. “I’m not going anywhere,” I promise.
She clasps my hand that’s on the back of the seat, then slips her beaded bracelets onto my wrist. “I haven’t decided yet on medicine or music. I’ve been more focused on finding you.”
I rake my free hand through my hair. Pain cinches around my lungs, my heart, my ribcage. “Anything else I missed?”
She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, then grimaces. “I shouldn’t tell you this…”
“I want you to,” I press. “I want to know.”
“Fine. Only because I think it’s likely your brothers will say something, and maybe it should come from me first.”
Okay.I nod her on. “Lay it on me, Fisher.”
She lets go of my wrist. “I was paranoid I might’ve been pregnant. I’m not. But I took a test.”
I swear my heart stops beating.
Her eyes are steady on mine. “Say something, Friend.”
“You thought you were pregnant? And I wasn’t there?” I visualize what she went through, and it thrashes inside of me like a feral animal clawing, tearing, shredding. My jaw clenches. I smear my hands over my face, bowing forward as nausea builds.
“Ben.”
I reawaken and wrap my arms around her, pulling her into my chest. “You’re okay?” I stare right into her eyes. Clinging. Holding. I cup her cheek.
“I’m all right,” she assures, her tiny smile easing me more. “I wasparanoid,okay. I bought the test the same night you left,beforeyou actually left, because I was freaking myself out.”
“The paper bag.” It dawns on me. I knew she was hiding something…but yeah, notthat.“I’m so sorry…you shouldn’t have had to deal with that alone, Harriet. I should’ve fucking been there.”
