Page 25 of The Truth about the Marquess
“Lord Harsham’s true character became known to me only once we were wed,” she said, her voice wobbling. “The reason my sister and her husband gave me this house and this employment is so that I would never have to think about tying myself to a gentleman again. You must understand, Louisa, that even if I thought Lord Edenbridge to be the very best of gentlemen, I do not think that I could ever bring myself to fully trust him. No, it is better for me to remain just as I am, I am sure of it.”
As she spoke, a sharp pain tore through her heart and she shuddered lightly, only for Lady Guilford to embrace her, holding her tightly until the shuddering had passed.
“I am truly sorry for my foolishness,” her friend said, releasing her. “I did not pause to think and, in my lack of consideration, it is clear that I have caused you great distress. I am sorry for that.”
Jane swallowed but tried to smile.
“It is quite all right. I am glad that you understand now.”
“I do, and I shall not make such a suggestion again, I promise you. Now, shall we go to find you something to drink all the same? You do look a little pale still.”
With a nod, Jane let her friend lead her through the crowd, still feeling a little weak. It had come as something of a shock, even to herself, to see how strong her reaction had been to what her friend had suggested but, yet, all the same, Jane hadto admit that her heart did hold a growing tenderness for Lord Edenbridge.
But that did not matter, she reminded herself, as a glass was pressed into her hands. She was free not to take a husband, she wasgladshe did not have to marry again, and that was all there was to consider.
I only wish that my heart did not pain itself at the thought,Jane considered, sipping the ratafia.Lord Edenbridge needs my help, nothing more. I can only ever be a friend to him and indeed, that is all I everwantto be to him!
That thought did not bring her any sort of happiness and, as she sipped again from the glass, Jane’s heart sank low. The ballroom light seemed to dim, the music taking on a sad intonation. Sighing heavily, Jane turned to make her way back to the corner of the room, and to the shadows waiting there.
Chapter Eleven
Ishould not have been eavesdropping.
Oliver pushed one hand through his hair as he leaned back against the wall of the ballroom, his heart heavy. He had not meant to hear Lady Guilford and Lady Harsham’s conversation, but given where they had been standing and where he had been, he had not been able to help it. He had, in fact, just been about to go and ask the lady if she would like to dance, only for Lady Guilford to ask a question which had struck Oliver sharply where he stood. Affixed to the spot on the floor, he had listened with an unwilling ear as Lady Harsham had explained in great detail why she could never consider him, and with every word that had come from her mouth, Oliver’s spirits had sunk lower.
It was a strange reaction, of course, for he did not understand what it was that had done such a thing to him - for everything she had said, he both understood and accepted. After all, given what he knew of the late Lord Harsham’s character, it seemed quite clear to him that the lady had been in great difficulty when it had come to her husband.
Though I do wonder what employment she was speaking of.
Shaking his head to himself, Oliver lifted his head, only to see the very person he had been thinking of coming back towards him. Her head was lowered, her steps heavy and Oliver’s heart immediately squeezed with a sudden agony - though it was mostly in sympathy for what she had endured with her late husband – as well as upset over what she had said about forever being alone. That was something he did not want for her, Oliver realized, though quite why he had any sort of investment in what she did and what her future was, he could not quite say.
“Lady Harsham.” Coming closer to her, Oliver smiled as her head lifted, though she did not smile back at him. “Good evening! I do hope you are well?”
“Yes, I am. Why, do not I not appear so?”
A little surprised at the slightly sharp response, Oliver shook his head.
“No, of course not. You appear just as you always are, Lady Harsham.”
“Oh.” Wincing, she closed her eyes and then sighed. “I apologize. I have just had a somewhat trying conversation, but that does not mean that I should be sharp in my words to you. Forgive me.”
“There is nothing to forgive.” He held out his arm and, much to his relief, she took it without hesitating and Oliver, letting instinct lead him, settled his other hand over hers for just a moment. “Are you quite all right?”
“Yes.” She looked up at him and smiled as he took his hand away. “I am quite well. Now, tell me of these young ladies that you have considered.”
“Ah.” Oliver chuckled, his eyes darting around the room in the hope of spying them. “The first is Lady Henrietta, the second Miss Leverton – though I find her shy and her mother, Lady Keswick, rather overwhelming – and the third, whom I have only found this evening, is Lady Bridget.”
Lady Harsham frowned.
“I do not think that I am acquainted with Miss Leverton and Lady Keswick, nor Lady Bridget though I do know Lady Henrietta.”
“And what think you of her?”
The lady smiled.
“She is kind and considerate. Her manner is good and her conversation excellent. I do not think that I have heard her gossip about anyone, though that does not mean anything, she might well be inclined towards such a thing. That is something you shall have to find out for yourself, I suppose.”
“Lord Dunstable has long been acquainted with their family and speaks very highly of her. I think her very pleasant, at least.”
