Page 28 of The Lovers
“I’m sorry, my lord,” Elise replied. “It isn’t for lack of trying. You apply yourself most diligently to begetting an heir.”
She knew she shouldn’t have said that, but a hot fury rose up within her. How could he blame her for not being pregnant, especially when his bastard rode her every other day as if she were a broodmare?
“Perhaps you’re barren,” Edward spat out, rising from the table with such anger that his chair clattered to the floor. “I shall summon the physician to have you examined. I assumed when I married you that you would prove as fertile as your mother, but perhaps my assumption was incorrect.”
With that, he strode from the room, leaving his food untouched. Elise sank into a chair, but her appetite had deserted her. What would he do to her if the physician found her incapable of bearing children? Perhaps he’d seek an annulment himself, but was it possible to get one on the basis of infertility? If that were the case, half the royal marriages would get annulled. And what would that mean for her and her family? Of course, Edward’s displeasure with her would be a moot point if she ran off with Gavin.
Elise sighed, reached for a jug of ale, and took a sip of the cool, sour liquid. She couldn’t go on like this. She needed to make a decision. She was going round in circles, but there were only two possible solutions. She could please her family and Edward by remaining exactly where she was and producing a male heir, or she could follow her own desires and leave with Gavin. Each choice came with its own set of consequences, but she had to decide if duty was more important than hope.
Elise sat there until she heard the wheels of Edward’s carriage rattling past the window, then pushed her chair away from the table, having decided to forgo breakfast. Instead, she went back to her chamber, where Lucy was busy making the bed.
“Lucy, leave off,” Elise said softly. “I feel unwell. I think I might lie down for a spell.”
“Is there anything I can get ye, me lady?”
“No. I just need to sleep. Please, make sure I’m not disturbed. Perhaps you can use the time to wash some of my undergarments,” Elise suggested slyly.
“Aye, of course, me lady.”
Lucy quickly collected Elise’s chemise, several pairs of stockings, and a shift, and left the room, closing the door softly behind her. Elise stretched out on the bed and waited. The garments didn’t really require washing just yet, but Lucy was an inquisitive girl and it was best to have her out of the way for a little while.
Once Elise was sure that Lucy wasn’t coming back, she put on her drabbest gown, pulled on a linen coif to hide her elaborate hairstyle, and put on an old, worn pair of boots that she’d meant to throw out. She peeked into the corridor to make sure that all was quiet before skipping down the stairs and slipping from the house unseen.
The day was overcast, with a gauzy mist shrouding the buildings in a blanket of moisture. It wasn’t very cold, but a raw damp seeped into her bones as Elise got closer to the river, and her face was wet to the touch as mist settled on her skin. She picked her way carefully, avoiding piles of refuse and pools of mud. She turned off on Black Friars Lane and then made another turn onto Carter Lane, where she made her way slowly down the street. It wasn’t long until she spotted what she was searching for. A heavily pregnant woman was walking carefully down the street, an empty basket swinging over her arm as she set off to do her daily marketing.
“Do excuse me,” Elise called out to the woman. “Me mistress sent me to fetch the midwife, but I seem to have lost me way. Would ye be able to direct me?” If anyone knew where the midwife was to be found, it was a woman near her time, Elise reasoned, and she wasn’t disappointed.
“I surely can, pet. Old Nan lives just round yon corner in Creed Lane. Third house on the left. Ye can’t miss it. There’s a birch tree as grows right in front.”
“Thank ye, mistress,” Elise said with a smile.
“Glad to help,” the woman replied and got on her way, waddling down the street at a glacial pace.
Elise followed the directions and was in front of the house in mere minutes. The birch was still bare, its slender trunk silvery in the morning mist. It was the only tree in the street, the old Tudor houses standing so close together that they practically leaned on each other for support. The upper floors overhung the lower ones, blocking out daylight and casting the street into a gloomy pall. The lack of sunlight prevented anything green from thriving, so the birch tree was a surprise. Elise took a deep breath before knocking softly on the door. She hoped Old Nan was in. A woman in her thirties opened the door, a smile of welcome on her face.
“I’m looking for the midwife,” Elise said.
“You’ve found me, then. Have someone’s pains started?” she asked as she reached for her cloak.
“No, I’m here for a somewhat different reason.”
“You’d best come in, then.”
The woman stepped aside and invited Elise into the house. A single candle burned on the table, casting a glow onto the walls. The room was sparsely furnished, but it was clean and warm. Old Nan herself looked clean and warm as well. There was a kindness in her eyes, and she was motherly in her manner, which put Elise at ease.
“Here, have a cup of broth,” Nan said. “’Tis bone raw out there today.”
Elise accepted the cup of broth gratefully and took the proffered seat. The broth was rich and hot, and she took a few warming sips before setting the cup down and raising her eyes to meet Nan’s.
“What can I do for you?” the older woman carefully asked.
“You see,” Elise began but faltered. She wasn’t sure exactly how to ask what she wanted to know.
“You wish to know if you’re with child.”
“No. I wish to know if there’s a way to prevent getting with one,” Elise blurted out.
“Are you married?” Old Nan asked.
