Page 75 of The Lady and the Footballer
It had been two days since he had lost his job and his place on the football team, and he had yet to tell his family.
He was ashamed. Ashamed that he had allowed his heart and his desires to get in the way of what truly mattered. Now, he would have no way to support the women who depended on him. He would eventually find a place to work, but he would have no chance to do nearly as well as he had with the Harcourt Mill and the football team combined.
Not only that, but Manchester Central had come to mean something to him. All of those men – even Rhys, who had yet to send a smile his way – were like family now, a family that he had been ousted from without even a chance to say goodbye.
Then there was Lily.
He couldn’t even think about her.
He still wanted her, with every part of his being. Worst of all – he was in love with her. He had tried to deny it for so long, but as he had sat there and watched her father remove everything that meant anything from his life, he had realized that she had mattered just as much, if not more, than the rest of it.
“Is something wrong with the stew?” his mother asked, breaking him from his self-pitying thoughts.
“It’s as wonderful as ever,” he said, trying and failing to put some emphasis in his tone.
“Why do I not believe you?”
“I’m sorry, Mother, I am,” he said. “It’s just…”
He looked around at his mother and sisters, all staring at him expectantly. They put so much trust in him. Believed in him. And he had failed them all.
“I have to tell you all something,” he said quietly.
And then he did.
When he finished, they all sat there in silence, his mother and sisters processing his news of how he had let them all down. He waited for their placating words to tell him not to worry, that it wasn’t his fault, which would be just that – words to make him feel better but would hide the truth of how they truly felt.
His sister spoke first. “Do you love her?”
“Pardon me?” he said, blinking at her. He had mentioned Lily when he had told them about investigating the club’s issues, but he hadn’t said anything about his involvement with her.
“Lord Harcourt’s daughter, Miss Evans. Do you love her?” she repeated.
“Why would you think that?”
His mother reached over and patted his hand with a soft smile. “Because when you speak of her, your expression changes. We know you better than you likely know yourself, Colin. We see those feelings that you refuse to give any credence to. Tell us what happened.”
“I—” he ran a hand through his hair. “I have developed feelings for her, yes. We had been seeing one another in secret, and I fear that, perhaps, her father discovered the truth and used the evidence as a reason to be rid of me.”
He looked at them all, imploring them to understand. “I am so sorry. Had I known that he would find out, I never would have continued with her. I’ve let you down. We’ve lost everything because I couldn’t stay away from her.”
“Colin Richard Thornton, that is not how I raised you.”
His head snapped up at his mother’s stern words before she continued.
“You did not lose everything. We have one another, and we always will. And you likely still have the woman you love, if you would take a chance and tell her how you feel.”
“Who says I haven’t already?” he couldn’t help but say defiantly.
His mother only raised a brow, reminding him that she knew him well enough to sense his lies.
“We all help one another around here, Colin,” she continued. “I am cooking again, and Diane is being paid more the further she goes in her apprenticeship. Soon enough, she will pass her teacher certification exam. Besides, you have been saving so diligently and will find something else very soon. But you might never find a woman you feel this way about again.”
“She’s the daughter of a viscount,” he protested.
“That doesn’t seem to make much difference to her,” Diane noted, and he sighed, running his hand through his hair again.
“I’ve told her time and again how different her life would be if she were to leave her current life for me, but she doesn’t seem to believe me.”
