Page 51 of Lady of Providence
“Perhaps I will not marry,” she said, refusing to look at Gabriel as she did so. “Or perhaps I will, but then I will maintain my current position. I am the head of this bank, and you must all understand that.”
They seemed appeased by her proclamation, and Elizabeth finally allowed herself to meet Gabriel’s eyes. His expression told her nothing, although she knew those eyes well enough to sense that they looked… haunted. Contemplative. Unsure.
“Thank you all for coming,” she said finally, unable to take the scrutiny any longer. “We will return to some of these matters at our next meeting in four weeks’ time. Good day.”
And with that, they began to file out. Elizabeth herself escaped before the lot of them. It was unlike her, but she had no wish to be left alone with Gabriel. Not now, not yet.
But as she entered her office, she heard a step behind her, and she knew she had no choice.
CHAPTER24
“You did well in there.”
“Congratulations, I see you have found your voice.”
Elizabeth took a deep breath after hearing the bitterness within her tone. She must ensure she remained calm and composed, despite the fact that inside she was still churning with anger. She was frustrated over her lack of control and seething over the fact that Henry had managed to not only undermine her credibility but to also cause damage to the bank. She wasn't succeeding in properly protecting the bank, as she had vowed to do when her grandfather passed it onto her, and that caused a great deal of guilt to fill her.
And, as ridiculous as it was, she was angry that Gabriel hadn't come to her defense in the meeting. Oh, she knew what it would look like if he had — that he was defending her because there was something between the two of them, or that he was trying to win her affections. But at some point she had neededsomeoneto stand up for her, to show her that she wasn't alone.
She whirled around now, aching to take it all out on him, to tell him how angry she was, how upset she was, but she couldn't.Don't show any emotion, Elizabeth, said the voice in her head, which for so long had been her mother's, but was now her own counseling her.It will only portray your weakness.
So instead she stood there, trembling within, her jaw set tightly and her hands in fists by her side.
Gabriel stood by the door, staring at her. Finally he turned, and she thought he was blessedly leaving, but instead, he shut the door and turned around, leaning back against it with his arms crossed.
"Let it out," he said, his voice commanding.
"What are you talking about?"
"All that you're feeling — let it out. Tell me what you are thinking. Be angry. Let the emotion flow. For God's sake, do something besides standing there looking at me as though I am speaking nonsense!"
"If you don't like it," she said, the words clipped, "then you are more than welcome to leave. In fact, I would prefer that you did."
"Is that what you want, Elizabeth? To be alone? To never have to rely on anyone else so you can say that you did it all by yourself?"
Elizabeth felt her ire rising, but she knew he was doing this on purpose, trying to goad her into saying something she shouldn't.
"That has nothing to do with anything personal," she responded. "You had your opportunity to rescue me if that's what you wanted to do so badly. You could have ridden your white horse into that meeting with your shiny suit of armor and told the rest of them, 'I agree with Lady Elizabeth. As a duke, I have seen the way she has consulted with the nobility, drawing them in as potential clients. I have full faith in her abilities.' But no. You arrived late, disrupting me, and then you simply sat there and allowed Henry to sway the rest of them in his direction."
Gabriel stared at her for a moment.
"Do you have no faith in your own abilities?"
"Of course I do."
"You didn't need me to do that for you, for you did it yourself. There are times when you need help, need someone to lean on, and then there are times in which you must show strength. Which you did in there."
He paused now, and Elizabeth could say nothing, for she could feel her chest rising and falling rapidly as she struggled to hold back the tears that threatened.
"I have to apologize,” he continued.
Well, this would be interesting. Gabriel never, ever apologized.
"Go on."
"When you first took over this senior partnership, I came in here and I questioned your abilities. That was not right of me to do. For I knew you were able to take on the position your grandfather had left to you. I was simply pushing you to make sure that you believed the same. I knew that you would want to prove yourself if I questioned you, and so I pushed."
Elizabeth’s expressionless wall finally broke, and she could only chuckle at Gabriel’s words, though he now looked at her as though she were slightly crazy.
