Page 179 of How to Kiss a Hawthorne Brother
“Say it all,” I say gently, hoping he senses how much I mean it.
“Lila, saying it all does not sound like taking things slow. You said that’s what you wanted.”
“I did say that. My heart hasn’t done a very good job of listening.”
His expression sobers as he picks up my hand. He places it against his chest, spreading my palm so it’s flat against his heart. “I didn’t know what my dad meant,” he says. “Not until now. Not until you.”
There are so many unspoken words hanging in the air between us, but for now, this feels like enough.
Do I love him? I think so. I would even say the look in his eyes says he probably loves me too.
But I can’t say it out loud. Not until I know he can love Jack, too.
Maybe he’s holding back for the same reason. Either way, it’s time. We can’t keep Jack out of whatever is happening between us. Not anymore.
“So I was thinking,” I say slowly, my hands sliding up his chest to his shoulders. A tiny thrill of excitement flits through me. I’m still not used to the fact that this man is mine, that I get to touch him like this. “What if I brought Jack to the festival next week? I was thinking we could go together.”
“The three of us?” he asks. His voice is hopeful, but I don’t miss the fear lacing the edges of his words.
“The three of us,” I repeat, willing confidence into my voice. It’s the right move. Jack is a charming kid. Of course Perry will fall in love with him. Everyone does.
Perry pulls me into a kiss, his tenderness quickly melting into something a little more fervent. He presses his forehead against mine. “I feel like I’m going to screw this up,” he says softly. “I don’t know what I’m doing, how to—”
I silence his words with another kiss. “We just have to take it one day at a time, okay? Nothing has changed. I’m still me. You’re still you. Now there’s just an extra small person we have to consider in all our plans.”
He takes a slow, deep breath, and I wonder if I just scared him off. But then he gives his head one small, decisive shake. “Okay,” he finally says.
I smile. “Okay?”
He nods. “One day at a time.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Perry
I bounce on myfeet as I scan the crowd at the harvest festival, anxious to see Lila, but nervous about seeing Lila andJack.It doesn’t make a lot of sense. I’ve been around Jack once before, and I feel like I handled things pretty well.
But this is different. Now, there are very specific expectations.
I don’t want to disappoint Jack.
Even more, I don’t want to disappoint Lila.
Mom nudges me from where she’s standing beside the barnyard gate, allowing kids to enter the petting zoo a few at a time. “She’ll get here when she gets here, Perry,” she gently scolds. “Just relax.”
I shake out my shoulders. “What if I miss her? There are a lot of people here.”
There’s a lull in the crowd as the last few kids make their way to the farm manager, who is on hand to supervise the animals. Mom takes advantage of the moment and turns to face me. “Perry. You aren’t going to miss her. She’s coming to seeyou.Is she meeting you here? At the petting zoo?”
I nod, even as my eyes scan over the crowd again.
“Then just be patient. She’s wrangling a five-year-old. Her life is ten times more complicated than yours for that reason alone.”
Mom’s words are meant to be reassuring, but they only make me worry more. “I’m going to walk toward the parking lot and see if I can find her.”
Mom scoffs. “Perry, if you leave, then she’ll show up here, and you’ll be gone. Why don’t you just call her?”
I pull out my phone and hold it up. “I will.”
