Page 70 of Absolutely Not in Love
Is this okay? Issheokay? Is this what she wants?
Desire flashes in her eyes, and then she leans forward, pressing her mouth against mine. There isn’t an ounce of hesitation in her movements. Her lips are warm and soft, and she tastes like the wine we drank with dinner, and I cannot get enough of her.
Her fingers tangle in my hair, and she tilts her head to deepen the kiss, but sitting like this, it’s hard to get close enough, to—
Gracie’s movements silence my thoughts as she shifts and settles herself on my lap, straddling me, making it possible to lean even further into the kiss. The warmth and weight of her sends heat racing through my body as my hands slide up her thighs, over the swell of her hips to her waist, then up to her back. I relax into the couch cushions, tugging her with me, nipping at her bottom lip while I capture her face with my hands.
“Gracie,” I say again. This time, her name feels like a plea for whatever this is, whatever is happening between us, to last forever. Her lips move from my mouth down to the side of my neck, tracing a line of tender kisses up to my ear while her hands slide over my beard. Her thumb brushes across my bottom lip, then we’re kissing again and again andagain,her tongue brushing against mine as we taste each other, move together, our bodies in sync in a way that I’ve never experienced before.
When she finally leans back, her chest rising and falling as she catches her breath, there’s a question in her eyes. “That was…Did that feel…?” She exhales slowly. “I’m not crazy, right? You feel it, too?”
Her hands are resting on her thighs, and I pick them up, threading our fingers together. “Like that was a lot more than just a first kiss?” I ask.
She nods. “I’ve never had a first kiss feel like that before.”
“I’ve never hadanykiss feel like that before.”
She chuckles and leans forward, dropping my hands so she can wrap her arms around me. Her head rests on my shoulder as her body relaxes against mine. “No, me neither,” she says, her breath brushing against my neck.
I lift my hands and rub slow circles over her back. “Does that scare you at all?”
She tenses the slightest bit, then she sits up and looks at me, her bottom lip caught between her teeth.
I brace myself for her response, but there’s an easy confidence in her expression. “It terrifies me. But I think it’s supposed to, Felix.” She leans down and presses a lingering kiss to my lips. “That’s how we know it’s good. When we’re already scared of losing it.”
Iamalready scared of losing whatever this is. It feels too big for a first kiss. The fact that Gracie senses it too makes me slightly less scared—at least I’m not reading more into things than she is—but it also makes memorescared. Because the stakes are suddenly higher, and I don’t want to do anything to screw this up.
Gracie tilts her head and lifts a finger to my forehead, tracing it between my brows. “You look like you’re thinking really hard right now.”
I lift my lips in a small smile. “Just…hoping I don’t screw this up.”
She gives her head a little shake. “You won’t.”
I tug her toward me and kiss her one more time.
I can only hope she’s right.
Chapter Seventeen
Gracie
Iamabsolutelyreadyto admit that my reasons for not dating hockey players have completely dissolved, at least when it comes to Felix Jamison.
Hockey? I love hockey. Best sport ever.
But there is one thing I don’t love.
And that’s the number of times we’re having to say goodbye.
It’s been just shy of two weeks since our first date, and Felix has been gone as many days as he’s been home. Once we get through this weekend, he’ll have several home games in a row, so we’ll have two solid weeks of uninterrupted time together, and we’re both counting down the days.
Not that the last two weeks have been anything but amazing. You can get to know a person really well through texts, something we do almost nonstop whenever he’s on the road. At least as nonstop as it can be when I have students to teach and faculty meetings to attend.
We’ve also managed to squeeze in a few more dates, including a fundraising event for the symphony, during which Felix made my stand partner Joyce’s hockey-loving husband cry real actual tears when he called Logan Barnes on his phone and had him say hello.
It’s been so good. But that just makes the goodbyes so much harder.
Felix leaves first thing tomorrow morning for back-to-back away games in Ohio, then Texas, which means we have to make the most of tonight.
