Page 85 of You Found Me
“You should have been able to bring it up as many times as you wanted without him brushing you off or making you feel like shit because of it.”
“I think I need to explain our relationship to you. I just don’t want you to think less of me for staying all these years.”
He moves closer to me, grabbing my hand again. “Emmy, I promise that I could never think less of you. I understand if you don’t want to take that chance.”
“No, I want to tell you. And I do believe you when you say that.”
“Then if you’re comfortable enough, tell me about your past with him. I promise not to judge you. I can’t promise not to look pissed off. Not at you though, only at his actions. Him, never you.”
Taking a deep breath, I begin to unravel my love story gone wrong. “Chance and I met in my sophomore year of college at a party. We talked to each other while we watched a game of beer pong and I liked him instantly. He was super charming and seemed interested in me. I excused myself to go to the restroom, but all of the ones downstairs were taken. I headed upstairs, found an open one, and when I came out, I bumped into a big guy. I’m talking massive. Instead of moving out of my way, he put both arms up against the doorframe.
“I thought maybe he didn’t hear me, so I apologized once again and tried to duck under his arm. His face twisted into something rancorous when he grabbed me by my upper arm, and I panicked. No one had ever touched me in such an aggressive manner before. He told me that I made a mistake coming upstairs by myself, then used his other meaty hand to grope my breast. I’ll never forget the cruel way he laughed at me. I was in shock and he just mocked me, said something absolutelyfoul about how he usually liked bustier girls, but I was ‘too pretty not to fuck.’
“Instead of yelling or trying to get free, I froze. I know fight or flight is a thing, I do. I just always thought I’d choose to fight. Luckily, it didn’t get farther than him touching me above my clothes before he was yanked off of me. And there stood my knight in shining armor—Chance. He yelled out, ‘back off, Mack!’then punched the guy a few times before checking to make sure I was okay. He walked me downstairs to find Mia and then we left.
“The following Monday, Chance was standing outside my English Lit class with an iced coffee, and a shoulder to lean on. We became inseparable after that. Mostly just friendly, he kept me in the friend zone, dating other girls, but then after the trip to visit Theo, he asked me out . . . and you know the rest. I don’t know why it all feels so frivolous now, maybe I felt indebted to him or something.
“But I could never see past my former white knight. I was just too stupid and too infatuated with him to realize how much of our relationship was manipulated. Especially when we moved in together. I rarely got to see my friends. He complained about them all the time, mostly Mia and Cori. Got aggressively frustrated if I hung out with them for too long. Looking back, I know it’s because they were the two who were the most vocal about the way I was being treated. They were not shy about their concerns in the slightest. And stupid me wanted to make him happy, so I slowly started to cut them off.
“I’m not proud of it. I refused to let him keep me from my parents though, and he made sure to turn on the charm anytime I was talking to them, or when they were visiting. Not even my mom knew how isolated I felt.
“Chance not showing up to their anniversary party threw them. I was so tired of covering for him at that point, hence the major meltdown I had. Which thanks again for being there for me. Finding him soon after that with Kari was my final straw. I was done. It makes me wonder how often it was happening. And I sincerely doubt Kari was the first.”
I wipe the tears that roll down my cheeks and turn back toward Spencer. “That’s it. Now you know everything. Or at least everything that makes me, me. I’m sure you can see why I’m scared to be with someone. I just . . . I don’t want to get hurt again. If you want to run, now would be your chance.”
Spencer pulls me onto his lap, waiting for me to look at him and when I do he says, “I will do everything in my power toneverhurt you. I’m human, I might mess up, but I will do my best by you.”
“I know you won’t hurt me, not on purpose anyway, I’ve seen that now that I’ve gotten to know you better. I’m more worried about hurting you because I think I’m broken. I have a biological dad out there who does not want me. I couldn’t keep Chance from straying. Oh, and the one boyfriend I had in high school broke up with me to be with someone else. Which I guess was fair since we were only together for a month. It’s inevitable for you to leave.”
“Emmaline, look at me,” he commands, and I realize I’d zoned off into the distance behind him. The hand not holding onto my hip lifts to my face and brushes against my cheek, his rough hand sending shocks through me. “You are not broken. Not once during that entire speech did I think, ‘oh she’s too broken for me,’ or ‘I don’t think I can handle her.’ The whole time I was in awe of you and how much strength you have. I’ll be honest, I understand why you feel broken, you have every right to feel that strongly. You’ve dealt with so much that would knock any regular person on their ass.”
I try moving off of him, unsure if I want to hear more of what he has to say. I mean he can’t be serious. Knowing I’m about to run, his arm wraps around my lower back.
“The difference is none of that has changed who you are at your core. You are still that Buttercup I met in college who had the brightest smile I’ve ever seen and seemed genuinely interested in what I had to say. Not just pity listening to me blabber on so you could eventually get into my pants.”He winks at me.
“Well. . .”I don’t get to finish my thought before he’s tickling my side. “Okay, okay! I’m joking. Obviously, I thought you were hot back then, but I did enjoy just talking to you.”
“Like I was saying,” he pins me with an amused look. “You are there for everyone you remotely care for. It’s probably why you felt the need to distance yourself from your friends for that twat waffle. You did love him, and wanted to save your relationship, and he took that for granted. Even if you decide this isn’t for you, I want you to find someone to love and cherish you. In the way you deserve. And I’ll be in the corner cheering you on because I care about your happiness that much. I hear you, I see you—but don’t ever say you’re broken again.”
I’m overwhelmed by how genuine he seems saying those words. He would put my happiness before his.Something Chance never considered in the years we were dating. Spencer’s crazy if he thinks I’d let him go and I tell him just that.
“I want to be with you. Outside of how patient you are, you have always considered my needs and feelings first. I don’t think I’ve ever met someone so thoughtful, and it’s a new feeling for me. But that only further proves to me how right this is, you’re the right man for me. I think some part of me always knew that, and I was just too scared to address it. So, if you’ll have me, I’d like to be your girlfriend. Forrealthis time.”
I’m met with the most beautiful smile, and I’m taken aback at how gorgeous this man is. Before I can tell him, he grabs the nape of my neck, kissing me as if it’s the only way he can go on. The kiss starts out slow and sensual until a slight bit of pain blooms on my lower lip and I gasp.
Chapter 26
Emmaline
He bit me.
And why does the pain of that make me shamelessly grind on his lap?
He uses my gasp as an invitation to thrust his tongue into my mouth. Truthfully, I’ve never been a fan of making out. Chance only did it when he was drunk, leaving the taste of cheap beer on my tongue.
But with Spencer? I think I could get off from just this. Like a teenager hopped up on newly discovered hormones. I hear something within the apartment, then realize it’sme.
Moaning.
