Page 84 of Unnatural
“When are you due?” Autumn asked.
“Eight more weeks.” Harper smiled. “It feels like a lifetime at this point. And like I should savor the time before I’m juggling two.” But she smiled again, bringing her hand to her swollen stomach. She obviously loved motherhood.
A longing rose up in Autumn, the hope that someday she’d have a family as beautiful as Harper’s. Harper and Jak had obviously found a way to make it work, even though she had to assume Jak had faced many of the same emotional and mental challenges that Sam did.
You’re getting ahead of yourself, thinking of a potential future with Sam when you haven’t figured out the present.
“It hasn’t all been smooth sailing,” Harper said, “Jak’s adjustment.”
Autumn was surprised that Harper had seemingly read her mind.
Harper offered a knowing smile. “I was once right where you are. Or…close enough anyway.” She paused. “They’re very much like wounded warriors. The adjustment to a more normal life is almost the easy part,” she said. “It’s the grief and the anger, the fear…those things are the real battles. But if Sam has come this far and retained his sanity and a heart that holds any amount of kindness, then there’s great hope that he’ll recover.”
Sanity. Kindness.Yes, he possessed both of those. And his heart didn’t just hold a small amount of kindness, it overflowed with it, whether he knew that or not. Whether hewantedthat or not.
He’s a walking miracle,Autumn was constantly reminded. And so was this woman’s husband. She suddenly felt an overwhelming wave of gratitude for having been brought together with Harper.I’m not alone.
“Will you tell me about your husband?”
Another smile tilted Harper’s lips, this one almost dreamy. But then it faded, a small crease forming between her brows. “He grew up alone, in the woods. He was forced to survive starvation and cold, things no human, much less a child, should endure. He was studied, watched, but never helped.”
Autumn’s blood chilled at the mere idea of a small child braving winter alone in a forest. “Oh God,” she whispered. What kind of evil had to run through a person’s veins to watch something like that and not be compelled to help?
And it made her wonder about Sam. He’d said he was cured with a medication that harmed him. That the medication made the surgeries he’d endured necessary. But he’d also been trained as a sort of super soldier to fight and to kill. But what had that training consisted of? Had Sam been tortured in ways he didn’t speak about? What had he experienced that Autumn still didn’t understand? Another chill went through her, this one born of fear at what she might not know. Knowledge she’d be faced with that would hurt.
But Sam will have been the one who experienced it. It’s not about you.Still, she felt herself bracing for what might be to come.
Harper had paused, but now she went on. “The loneliness was the worst, I think. And knowing that others could have helped him but didn’t.”
Autumn nodded. She understood that, even if she didn’t yet have all the pieces of her own puzzle. But to know that hospital staff possibly stood by as she was lied to and hurt made her heart crack under the weight of the betrayal. To know that others might not have considered her worth saving, even strangers, hurt in a way that was difficult to articulate. Someone had decided her life meant nothing. It had to take someone so viciously soulless to be able to watch a child endure horrific circumstances and not step in. “Did those people come to justice?” she asked.
Harper paused. “Yes. I’d say so. Except for the man who heads the program,” she murmured, her brow furrowing as she pulled her coat more tightly around her.
“Dr. Swift,” Autumn said.
“Yes, that’s him,” Harper said. “If any human being deserves to burn in the fiery pits of hell, it’s that man. And until he’s caught, this network will continue.”
“He’s the head of the snake,” Autumn murmured.
“Exactly.”
“Does Jak have a role in this task force that Agent Gallagher runs?”
“He consults with Mark, yes. We’re also able to provide part of the funding in the form of private donations when necessary. Jak’s grandfather left him a rather large inheritance when he died.” They rounded a bend in the river and walked in silence for a moment before Harper stopped. “Should we turn around?”
Autumn halted too. “Oh, yes, I’m sorry. You’re probably tired.” They turned and began heading back to the house that was a mere speck now. Autumn could barely make out the two figures standing at the deck, talking about who knew what.
Harper smiled. “I’m fine, but Sam will be looking for you, and I don’t want to walk out of sight. He’ll want to see where you are, even if you’re not right next to him.” She gave Autumn a smile that was both teasing and knowing. “You’re obviously very close.”
Autumn felt Harper’s questioning gaze on her but felt warmed by her curiosity. She had an ally, someone who understood something few others would.
“Yes,” Autumn said. She gave her a brief description of how they’d met, glossing over most of the details the way Harper had with Jak’s story. She knew they both understood the magnitude of what was beneath the surface. Autumn had a feeling she and this woman were going to be friends, not only because of their shared experience but because she seemed like a lovely person and was already easy to talk to.
There was a relatively short stone wall separating the property they were staying on and the one next to it, andHarper gestured to it and then hoisted herself up, letting out a small laugh at what Autumn assumed she saw as a lack of grace. Autumn took a seat next to her, glancing up at the deck where both Sam and Jak were still conversing, both men leaning on the rail, their gazes fixed on the spot where Autumn and Harper sat. Autumn moved her gaze to the water where Harper was also looking, and for a moment, they sat in companionable silence.
After a minute, Harper said, “You love him.”
Was it that obvious? “Yes,” Autumn admitted, and something about admitting it to another person made it feel all the more real. She picked at a thread on the hem of her wool coat. There were so many issues, so many questions to resolve, healing that had to happen. But it seemed to Autumn that all that would come much more easily if she could help Sam through it. With love. The same way that Bill and the town had helped her. Day by day. But while the town and Bill loved her, she wasin lovewith Sam, and that, perhaps, added a level of complication. “How do I love him right?”
