Page 178 of Love Undiscovered
“Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t,” Eliza says.
“Fine,” I say. I open a test from each box and set them out on the bathroom counter. I stand and lift the toilet seat, then turn, gesturing for one of them to unzip my jumpsuit in the back.
“It’s a good thing nudity doesn’t make me uncomfortable,” I say to them as I peel my underwear down with the jumpsuit and sit back down on the toilet.
“Okay,” Audrey says. “With each one, you have to hold it under the stream for a few seconds, so make sure you stop going in the middle then start again with the second test.”
I nod my head and grab the first test, and wait.
“God, your breasts are fantastic,” Eliza says. “Breastfeeding is going to ruin them.”
My hands go up to my breasts instinctively and cup them. The first test still in my right hand.
“Shit, I didn’t even think about what it’s going to do to my body. I can’t do this. I have a hard enough time with my weight as it is!” I say.
“Are you kidding me? You have such an amazing body,” Audrey says.
“Says the tall, willowy model with no muffin top,” I say sourly.
“Right?” Eliza says in my defense.
Audrey waves her hand at us in dismissal. “Can you pee?” she asks.
I nod and concentrate, do my thing with each test stick, re-dress, wash my hands and wait the requisite three minutes.
“Where do your parents think we are?” I ask.
“Dad won’t notice we’re gone,” Eliza says.
“And Mom thinks we’re getting your opinion on maternity fashion,” Audrey says.
“Charlie wasn’t here yet, so she doesn’t matter,” Eliza says.
The timer Audrey set on her phone goes off. We all look at each other.
“I think I’m going to be sick,” I say, bending over to put my head between my knees.
“Oh, that’s definitely a sign,” Audrey says clapping her hands.
“What do they say?” I ask, still bent over. Part of me wishes I was doing this with Kat and Lexie. But I’ve grown close to Audrey and Eliza over the last couple months, and I definitely appreciate them being here. I don’t think I could do this alone. I’m not sure what I want. I’m hoping the results will tell me what I want.
Like, if I’m pregnant and I’m happy about it, then I’ll know having a baby is the right choice. Although I guess if I’m not pregnant and I’m sad about it, that is the same thing.
So, what if I’m pregnant and I’m sad about it? Do I abort? Does Chance get a say either way? Does his family?
Fuck.
I wish I knew what I wanted.
“Ready?” Eliza asks.
“Ah! Yes. No. Yes,” I say.
“Pregnant!” Audrey and Eliza both say at the same time.
* * *
Chance
