Page 82 of Dangerous Encore

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"You make mecheesy."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. This is a great life. We could have a great life raising kids too. It would be different, hardermaybe."

"Definitelyharder."

"Is that whatyouwant?"

"I'm not sure." Her voice is soft. "I can see it, when I squint, but it would mean giving up so many other things. It would mean a lot ofchanges."

Inod.

"My dad… I asked him about him and Mom. He said he didn't know for sure, until she told him she waspregnant."

"You think you'll know when you seethetest?"

"No, but I'm praying I will." She stares back into my eyes. "How is it you're always so confident and sure ofyourself?"

"You knowI'mnot."

"But this. You'resteady."

Am I? It feels more like I'm shaking. This is big, and it mostly falls on her shoulders, and I can't do shit about that. "I meant what I said yesterday. We can get through anythingtogether."

Shenods.

"Youready?"

"No, but I'm not sure I'm ever going to be." She presses her lips together. "Let me brush my teethfirst."

I nod and watch her move into the bathroom. She leaves the door half open as she brushes her teeth and washesherface.

There's something different in her posture today. Somethingsofter.

The anxiety isn't swallowingherhole.

I have to let her decide this forherself.

Unfortunately, shutting the fuck up is not one of my strongsuits.

I push off the counter and fix another cup of coffee. It buys me enough time with my mouth shut for her to pull the test from her purse and press it between herpalms.

"I guess the easiest thing to do is to pee in a cup,"shesays.

I pull open the cupboard. "Which one iscallingyou?"

"You want to use the cupafterthis?"

"I'll wash itfirst."

"Still."

I laugh. "Okay, we can destroy the cupafterthis."

She points to the San Francisco Starbucksmemorablecup.

"Angel, I'm not sure how totakethat."

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