Page 92 of Come Apart
After dinner we watch a movie on the couch.The Apartment,one of her favorites, though she's partial to anything directed by Billy Wilder. Sometimes I wonder where she found the time to see so many movies and read so many books. She's almost as well versed in film as my mother was.
But then I remember that she spent so much of her life alone. Even when she thought she had someone, she was alone.
Her mood lightens. She wraps her arms around me, laughing and gasping at all the appropriate parts of the movie.
And then my phone rings.
Alyssa brings her eyes to me. "At this time, it must be her."
"I'll turn it off."
She pushes herself up and moves to the opposite side of the couch. "What if she just attempted suicide again?"
"That's ridiculous."
She folds her arms. "Not that ridiculous."
"I'll text her that I'll call back later. I want to spend my night with you." She doesn't say anything. My phone is on the kitchen table. Missed call from Samantha Brooks. I send her a text.
I'm working late. I'll call you back tomorrow. Is everything okay?
She replies almost instantly.I guess so, but I'd like to talk to you. It's important.
I look over to the couch. Alyssa has her hand pressed against her chin. She's trying to keep her attention on the TV, but she has one eye on me.
Whatever Samantha wants, it will have to wait. I set my phone on the table and move back to the couch.
Alyssa reaches for me. She presses her hand against mine. "I was snooping before you got here."
"Is that a habit?"
She nods. "You have so much of Samantha's stuff in that office."
I do. Not because it means anything. Just because I haven't had a use for the space and cleaning it out sounds like a lot of work.
"Do you want the office?"
As soon as I say it, I know it's the best way to use that room full of the past.
Fill it with my hopes for the future.
She swallows. "It seems like a waste of a room."
"What if it was your room?"
"My room for what?"
I take her hand. "Whatever you want. It could be your library or your rehearsal room or your masturbation room."
She laughs. "Just what I wanted."
I move closer to her. "I mean it. I want you to have your own space here."
She shifts back just a little bit. Her eyes turn to the floor. "You sure?"
"I'll clean it out this weekend."
She bites her lip, thinking it over. She looks over to the room then back to me. "I'll believe it when I see it."
