Page 129 of Come Apart
"I'm starting Monday. I couldn't have done it without you." She sets her glass on the table. "I wouldn't even be here without you."
"Yeah."
Samantha brings her gaze to me. She's happy. But something... isn't right.
Her gaze softens. "What's wrong?"
I shake my head. "Nothing."
"Please, I'd love to hear about anything except for the pathetic failure that is my life."
"You're not a pathetic failure," I say, but there's no meaning behind it. It's rote.
"Thanks. I was just... there's something bothering you." Samantha clears her throat. The joy on her face turns to something ugly. Just for a split second. But I catch it. "Is it about your girlfriend?"
She looks so earnest, but I know it's all bullshit. "You weren't very polite at dinner."
"I was trying to make conversation."
"And the cake?"
She shrinks back. "I ate some cake. Is that a crime?"
"Look me in the eyes and swear you didn't know about Alyssa's history with an eating disorder."
Her eyes turn to the floor. "I didn't know it was still a problem."
Her voice doesn't waver. But I don't buy it.
She polishes off her glass and refills it. "Why would I try to hurt her? What problem could I possibly have with your girlfriend?" It's a stupid question, and it doesn't merit an answer.
"Please don't make me choose between you," I say instead. "I'm not going to choose you."
"Choose what?" she asks, deliberately playing dumb. "Luke, you're my best friend. I'm happy you're happy."
"Then why all the trips down memory lane? Were you trying to make her jealous?"
"No!" she pushes back. "I only wanted to revisit a few nice memories. I want to be friends with her. I want you to be with her. I want you to be happy."
They're the right words. But they don't sound smooth and easy.
She swallows hard. She's not selling it well.
"Alyssa asked for space."
It's a test.
My eyes are glued to Samantha. If she has any feelings about this, I'm going to catch them. She's not going to bullshit me again.
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that." She takes a careful sip from her glass, her eyes on the floor. "What happened?"
"It's kind of complicated," I say. "But mostly, I think... she's not really comfortable with our friendship."
"What's there to be uncomfortable about?"
I take a deep breath. I don't want to push Samantha this hard, but I have to know where things stand. "She thinks you have feelings for me."
"Oh." She presses her fingers into the glass. "I told you to go back to Los Angeles to be with her."
