Page 186 of The First Time

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"You'll have to tell him."

"I know."

She pulls back with a supportive smile. "If you want to be alone, that's okay too."

I shake my head.

She claps her hands together. "Okay. Good. We brought pho."

"It's the middle of the night," I say.

"Ethan found a place open 24 hours." She motions for Ethan to come here.

"No, I'll go to the counter." I force myself off the couch. "Less mess."

"Okay." Violet follows me into the kitchen.

One by one, we take our seats. Ethan empties the take out bags. The containers take up almost all the counter space.

Ethan hands me a spoon and chopsticks. And the bottle of sriracha. "What happened, Piper?"

God, they left their party and rushed to get me takeout without even knowing what it was that was wrong. It's possible Violet guessed and convinced Ethan it was important. Even so, that's a lot of love and support.

I have all this...

And Kit has nothing.

God, I'm feeling sorry for him again. And it's not even true. Kit has Mal, Ethan, and Joel. And he has me. And Violet. Maybe it's not the same, but it's a lot.

I pull the top off my container of noodles then get to work adding toppings. I need to tell Ethan, but I can't look him in the eyes while I do it. It's not that there's anything wrong with me seeing Kit, or sleeping with Kit, but I can't excuse lying to my brother about it.

Deep breath. "Ethan, I have to tell you something."

I try to keep my eyes on my cilantro, my strips of meat, my spoon. But my gaze goes to my brother and his girlfriend. She's squeezing his hand, anI hope this is okaylook on her face.

His blue eyes are curious, confused.

"Promise you won't be mad." I stir my noodles. "I didn't do it to hurt you."

"Pipes, I can't promise that without an idea of what it is." He looks me in the eyes. "What is it?"

Mal nods to mego ahead.

Violet does the same.

Maybe this is okay.

Maybe.

I hold Ethan's gaze. "I've been seeing Kit."

Ethan's eyes go wide. "Seeing?"

"Dating. And sex too. I mean, I don't want to offer details, but we were having sex." I stir my soup until the broth is spinning.

Anger flares in Ethan's eyes. He grits his teeth. He must be fighting his desire to storm off to beat Kit up. Not that he'd make much headway. The bassist must be halfway to San Francisco by now.

"Honey, listen to her before you freak out." Violet rubs Ethan's bicep.