Page 331 of The First Time
I don't want anyone buying my allegiance.
Deep breath. I tear the check in half.
The paper flutters to the ground.
Fuck. There go my options.
"There's no shame in needing money." Blake finishes his whiskey and sets his glass on a wide table. "You can admit it."
I dig my heels into the hardwood. "Fine, I need the money. I'm not a billionaire. I don't have a tech company. In fact, I don't have a fucking penny to my name. It's just my sister and me. No one else will help. Is that what you want to hear?"
"If it's the truth."
"I need your fucking money. I hate that I need your money, but I do."
His stare cuts through me.
I turn away. Fuck this. Blake can't intimidate me.
I go to push myself up but he grabs my wrist.
"Don't," he says.
"Why? This is a business arrangement. Our terms are the same. There's nothing to talk about." There's no way to get what I want. Not like this.
His grip tightens around my wrist.
"We're not friends."
"Aren't we?" He pulls my body into his. "I care about you."
"You don't care how I feel."
"Yes, I do." His breath warms my ear. "I know this is hard for you. And I hate that. But there isn't another way."
"But you…" I don't know what to say. His voice is sincere. He does care about me. "How much?"
"How much?"
"Do you care about me? Am I a colleague? A friend? A lover?"
"I'm not going to fall in love with you." The words are easy. Like he's talking about the time.
My stomach sinks. "I don't know if I can do this without falling in love with you."
"Kat…"
"I know. You'll never love me. I understand." Sort of. He thinks he'll never love me. But he does care about me. And that's how it starts.
Blake looks me over. His gaze is softer. There's affection in it.
He picks the pieces of the check off the floor and sets them on the side table.
"You can still take Fiona's money."
"I don't want it."
"Good. Pretend like this never happened."
