Page 21 of The Dating Coach
"We've been on this 'small detour' for an hour," Karen pointed out, somehow managing to look glamorous despite the mud splattered on her designer hiking boots. "At what point does a detour become genuinely lost?"
"We're not lost," Frank insisted, despite having led us confidently in what I was now certain were circles. "I have an excellent sense of direction. It's like a superpower."
"Your superpower is getting us killed by bears," Karen shot back. "Or worse – having to drink our own urine to survive."
"No one's drinking urine," Liam said calmly, though I could see him fighting a smile. "We have water bottles."
"For now," Karen said darkly. "But when we're found in spring, nothing but skeletons clutching empty water bottles, remember I called it."
Mia, who'd been documenting our misadventure on her phone, laughed. "The Fall of the Friendship Group: A Tragedy in Three Acts. Act One: Frank's Hubris."
"I don't have hubris," Frank protested. "I have confidence. There's a difference."
"The difference is spelling," Henry muttered, still glaring at his phone like he could intimidate it into finding signal.
I looked around at the endless trees, all of which looked identical to my untrained eye.
"Maybe we should go back the way we came," I suggested.
"Which way is that?" Karen asked. "Because I've seen that same crooked tree at least three times, and I'm starting to think it's following us."
As if the universe had been waiting for the perfect comedic timing, the sky chose that moment to open up. Not a gentle drizzle or a warning sprinkle – a full-on downpour that had us all scrambling for cover.
"Are you fucking kidding me?" Karen shrieked, pulling her jacket over her head. "This is exactly like a horror movie! Next someone's going to suggest we split up!"
"We should definitely not split up," Henry said firmly. "But we do need shelter."
Through the rain, I caught sight of what looked like a rocky overhang. "There!" I pointed. "Cave or at least some cover!"
We ran for it, slipping and sliding on the suddenly muddy trail. Liam steadied Mia when she stumbled, and I felt a flutter of gratitude for his automatic protectiveness. The overhang turned out to be a small cave, shallow but dry enough to shelter six soggy hikers.
"Well," Frank said, wringing out his shirt, "this is cozy."
"This is a disaster," Karen corrected, though she was fighting a smile. "My hair is ruined. I look like a drowned poodle."
"A very attractive drowned poodle," Frank offered gallantly.
We arranged ourselves in the small space, ending up pressed closer together than strictly necessary. I found myself between Liam and the cave wall, hyperaware of every point where our bodies touched. He'd given Mia his rain jacket without hesitation, leaving him in just a t-shirt that was now plastered to his chest in extremely distracting ways.
"So," Henry said after a moment of listening to the rain pound outside our shelter. "While we're stuck here, maybe we could... talk?"
"Talk?" I asked warily. "About what?"
"I don't know. Deep stuff. Secret stuff. It's like a slumber party but with more potential for death by exposure."
"I'll start," Frank announced. "I have a confession. I've been thinking about changing my major to culinary arts."
"That's your big secret?" Karen asked. "You literally cook all the time. We all knew that."
"I haven't told my parents," Frank admitted. "They think business majors are the only valid life choice. But I love cooking. I want to open a restaurant someday. Something small, weird menu, maybe cryptid-themed."
"The Sasquatch Diner," Mia suggested immediately.
"See, she gets it!" Frank beamed at my sister. "What about you, Mia? Any secrets to share with the cave?"
Mia glanced at me, then took a breath. "I guess... my secret is that coming out wasn't the hardest part. The hardest part is being happy about who I am while knowing it cost me my parents. Like, I'm proud of being gay, but I feel guilty for not feeling guiltier about losing them. Does that make sense?"
“Perfect sense,” Frank said quietly. “Jesse, our hockey teammate, came out to his parents in his sophomore year. They didn’t take it well, but with support from Liam, Henry, and me, he’s doing much better now. Yet he still has days when he feels like he disappointed them simply by existing authentically.”
