Page 78 of Bound by Desire
“Never hated you, Deke. Just saw so much in you and knew you had so much inside that you weren’t living up to. I fucked that shit up and didn’t do right. I take that. It’s my burden to bear. All these years, I wondered what I could’ve done different, and there they were, smacking me in the face every damnsecond.”
He clears his throat before continuing, “When you were born, your mom and I were so damn scared we were going to lose you, and I had all these ideas of what you’d be. You were on the right path for so long, and somewhere I fucked up and let you go down the wrong one. Know that now, and know I put it all on you. Not fair. I’ve made mistakes. I own them. Just hope you and I can heal. Son, I’msorry.”
When he clasps his hand on my shoulder, it takes everything in me to keep myself together. Never thought this daywouldcome.
“Pissed you had to stay home because of your mom bein’ sick, but happy for it nonetheless.” He pulls me to him, and I crash into his chest willingly, wrapping my armsaroundhim.
Years. For fucking years, this feeling inside of me rode me hard. Then, in one moment, with only a few words, that part of mesettles.Fuck.
“Right. I need to get back to Austyn,” Cruz says. “She’s dealin’ with all this shit. Won’t talk to us. But she’s strong, and we’ll figure this shit out. She doesn’t want to see Ryker, and that little shit won’t leave my porch. Can one of you make sure the man eats at somepoint?”
My father and I break apart, giving our attention backtoCruz.
“Yeah, Dad,”Noxsays.
“Well, I’m making food,” Ma proclaims, moving into the kitchen. “We need to eat, and I’m good at this. Food always helps.” Ma takes off, concern all over her face, as Cruz and Princess maketheirexit.
Everyone is feeling Austyn’s pain and adjusting in their own way. Hate it, butwedeal.
“Is there anything I can get ya?” Rylie asks mymother.
“Water,please.”
“Of course.” She moves in the same directionasMa.
“Time has come, boys, to put this shit between the two of you in the past. You’ve got good women, good heads on your shoulders, and need to work through this. It’s time. It’s been too fuckin’ long. Now, I need a beer,” Pops says, leaving my father, mother, and me in thelivingroom.
“We both fucked up. Me worse because I shoulda listened to you, instead of bein’ a dick. Now we move past it and get on with ourlives.”
“Justlikethat?”
“Yeah, boy, justlikethat.”
And that’s what we do. Move the fuck on. It’s something I’ll never forget, but he’s said his peace, admitted he was wrong, which is tough for a man like GT. Now we pick up and start to rebuild. It’ll take time, but eventually, it’llhappen.
* * *
“We’regonna need to have a garage sale,” Rylie says from the living room of my apartment. “I think we should just buy a housetogether.”
“Finebyme.”
“What?” shegasps.
“Don’t like it here, but needed a roof over my head. You want a house, let’s get a house. I’m good with that. Pick what you want, I’llbuyit.”
“We’llbuyit.”
I pull her to my body, and she brings her hands to my chest, clenching my shirt. “I haveadick.”
“We’ve established this on more than oneoccasion.”
My lips tip up. “Right. So, dick, I pay. You want shit inside the place, go for it. I pay for the house and utilities. It’s not up fordebate.”
“Deke, I make damn good money. I want tocontribute.”
Brewer jumps up, giving a small grunt in agreement toRylie.
No.
