Page 79 of Echoes of Us
"I don't know how," she whispered.
"Nobody does," her mother said, stroking her hair like she used to when Ashley was small."We just...keep going.And sometimes, when we stop trying so hard to control everything, things have a way of working themselves out."
* * *
Ashley stayedhome for three days.
"Three days," her mother had said, hands wrapped around her morning coffee."That's how long it takes to know if a big decision is right.The first day you're emotional, the second you're rationalizing, but the third..."She'd smiled, soft and knowing."The third day is when you finally feel it in your bones."
So Ashley waited.She baked cookies with her mother, listened to her father's enthusiastic reviews of local restaurants, and let the silence of her childhood home wash over her.Her phone remained off, a dark rectangle on her bedside table that held a world she wasn't ready to face.
On the third morning, she turned it on.
The notifications flooded in like a tidal wave.Missed calls, texts, voicemails.Sarah's name appeared most frequently, followed by a string of concerned messages from Mike and Lisa.Dale had texted twice - simple, careful messages asking if she was okay.Even Ezra had tried to reach her, his texts increasingly annoyed.
Nothing from Cole.
She waited until evening before calling Sarah when the sun had turned her room golden, and she felt steady enough to speak the words she'd been rehearsing.
"How are you?"Sarah demanded, concern lacing her voice.
"I'm transferring to Harvard," Ashley replied bluntly.The words felt like a relief, like finally exhaling after holding her breath too long.
The silence that followed felt heavy enough to touch.
"You're what?!"
"Next semester."Ashley lay back on her childhood bed, watching familiar shadows dance across her ceiling."My grades are good enough.I can finish this semester remotely."
"Is this about Cole?"
"No."Ashley closed her eyes, remembering how he'd crouched before her in the lab, still so perfectly himself.For now."It's about me.About seeing things, I can't unsee.About..."She thought of her mother's hands in the garden, steady now where they used to shake."About letting go before things completely break."
"What things?"Sarah demanded.
"Everything."The word came out painfully.The future she remembered, the man she'd married, the imposter he'd learned to become."I can't stay and watch what happens next."
"You're not making sense."
"I know."Ashley opened her eyes, staring at the glow-in-the-dark stars she'd stuck to her ceiling years ago."But I need to do this."
"And Dale?The research position?"
"Dale will understand."She hoped he would, anyway."Better than anyone."
Sarah was quiet for a long moment."You're sure about this?"
"More sure than I've been about anything."Ashley's voice steadied."I need to get away from the physics department.From the Westwoods.From everything."
Sarah sighed, long and deep."Well, shit.I can't say I understand, but you did warn me after all."
"About what?"
"That you'd bail the moment things got complicated here."Sarah's laugh was soft, sad."After I won our bet about Yale?You said you'd transfer to Harvard the second you stopped liking it here."
Ashley's throat tightened at the memory she didn't have - another moment from this timeline she'd missed."Sounds like something I would say."
They talked a bit longer - about practical things, about credits transferring, about Sarah visiting.But underneath it all ran a current of certainty Ashley hadn't felt since waking up in this timeline.
