Page 75 of Colt
“Well. Good luck to her I guess.”
That does earn me an expression I can’t quite read. But then we are having steak and corn on the cob, baked potatoes and one of my stepdad’s great pies. So I’m not thinking about anything else for a moment. Good food, good family. This house. It’s a home, in a way that nothing else ever really has been for me.
These people are my home.
When dinner finishes, Allison is quick to volunteer to do dishes, and I’m about to do the same when Gentry jabbed me in the shoulder. “I need to talk to you.”
My stomach tightens. “Do you?”
“Outside.”
I already know what it’s about. I don’t need him to give me a knowing look, or explain anything. I just know.
We head out the back door, and I’m hoping that we don’t attract attention. I’m bracing myself. For him to yell at me. For him to punch me in my face. For him to sit me down and interrogate me like I’m a criminal.
I’d deserve any of those things.
I knew that I had messed up last night. And I had a very strong feeling that Gentry had seen it. I was hoping, since he didn’t storm my front door early in the morning that it meant I had gotten away with it. But apparently not.
“So, what do you need to tell me?”
I think about trying to get around it. About making him say at first. Because if he doesn’t know, and I tell him, I’m just causing drama that doesn’t need to exist.
But I already know.
And one part of my realization from my collapse last night is that I have to own my shit. I have to stand there and take it on the chin, maybe literally.
“I’m sleeping with your sister.”
I expect Gentry to lunge forward. Instead, he lets out a slow breath, rocks back on his heels, and drags his hand down over his face. “All right. Okay. You’re sleeping with her.”
“Yeah. I am.”
“To what end?”
“To no end, Gentry. We just… I don’t know. It was a forced proximity or something.” The lie tastes bitter on my tongue. Forced proximity, a whole lot of longing that boiled over and had to express itself. One or the other.
The fact that she’s beautiful and smart and resilient. The fact that she has shown me so many things about how to be a better person. How to be a more accepting, together person. Thefact that I’m just saying I’m sleeping with her rather than in a relationship with her, but it’s not a relationship. Not really. It also isn’t just sex. But just like last night at the bar, I don’t know how to express that.
“We didn’t want anyone to know, because we’re aware that it’s messed.”
“Okay, let’s start over. You and Allison are sleeping together.”
“Correct.”
“But that’s all it is.”
“Yes. She’s going to move closer to the hospital in a couple of months. I don’t know if she’s talked to you about that. But it makes more sense for rotations and all of that. So…”
“So, distance is the problem?”
I laughed. “No. The problem is that she’s my stepsister. You know how everybody in town would react to that.”
“Who cares? You’re Colt Campbell. You can do whatever you want. You could do the electric slide naked down Main Street, and people would be like: Wow, that’s a really cool thing he’s doing. Why do you think anyone would care if you were with her?”
“Don’t be dense. You know how it looks. It looks like maybe… I don’t know. Like something happened when we lived together, and it didn’t.”
“I know it didn’t. I know you. I don’t think that you ever took advantage of my teenage sister when we lived together. I don’t think you ever used your position as her stepbrother to do anything inappropriate. If I thought you would do that, I wouldn’t be your friend, Colt.”
