Page 11 of Dustin
After yesterday, I thought we were making progress, but now the look in his eyes tells me that he hates me very much.
“Do you know the worst part with regards to what happened yesterday?” he questions while sitting up.
“That you thought I was in danger?” I guess.
He shakes his head.
“For one second, just a split second, I thought you had disappeared on me again, and I was terrified.”
My heart thunders in my chest at his words.
“Do you realize what that means, Madison?”
He stands up abruptly, forcing me to take a step back. He looks me straight in the eye.
“What?” I whisper.
“It means that a part of me still cares about you and what you do. And I really can’t have that.”
He stands up to get some water while I sit on the couch and ponder his words. I’m still there when he returns.
“Did I ever apologize for what I did?” I suddenly ask.
He arches an eyebrow.
“I don’t know, Madison. Did you?” He throws the question back at me.
I shake my head.
“I didn’t. Because I knew some bullshit explanation and a few measly words weren’t going to be enough. I just thought it would be easier to let you hate me.”
“All right then. That’s fine by me,” he agrees.
“But I can’t. Not anymore, at least. We’re so much older now. We should be more mature and able to handle things.”
“I am mature,” he says through gritted teeth.
“Really? Because right now, you’re acting like a child throwing a tantrum.”
His eyes blaze, and I realize I might have gone a little too far this time.
Chapter 5
(Dustin)
______
A child throwing a tantrum?!
This is why I avoid talking about my feelings. It’s so easy for someone to say ‘just get over it’, but when the love is deep, so are the scars.
Someone steals some food from the store and everyone’s more concerned by the act, not the driving force behind the action. They’re not going to change their opinion just by having a conversation. That’s exactly why I see no point in having one with Madison right now.
“I see. Allow me to continue being a child, then. Leave me alone.”
She stares at me, and I watch as that darn bottom lip disappears into her mouth. Does she realize how distracting it is? I’m trying to be angry, but instead, I’m thinking about her mouth and how good it felt to kiss her. I miss those days when I could kiss her without permission. She was mine. But those days are gone, and they're never coming back.
I fall back onto the couch and close my eyes, silently dismissing her. From now on, I will only talk to her when I absolutely have to.
