Page 138 of Unspoken Lies
The way he calls her that makes me smirk. Jared really embraced his role as her husband.
“The unresolved issues are fucking with her head,” I explain. “Just because Liliana and I know her better doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. The way you’re doing it isn’t working. Elijah you can’t apologize and then push her until she explodes on you. Edging her is also fucking rude unless you’re planning to make her come soon after. The power dynamic play you guys enjoy is only okay if she knows the rules. Otherwise, it feels like you’re being hot and cold.”
Rachelle told me everything that’s happened while I’ve been gone. There are no secrets, and it’s helping me lay out my cards on the table.
“Argh,” Theo groans. “We may have edged and teased her.”
“Yeah, fucker, I know,” I mutter.
“She told you everything over the two weeks?” Jared asks.
“There’s no secrets between us unless it’s something we haven’t had time to talk about,” I say firmly. “I also don’t consider something a secret if Rachelle isn’t ready to talk about it. Though, in that case, Liliana can help me tease theinformation out of her. She’s still really innocent despite the life she’s led.”
“It’s hard to remember that sometimes,” Elijah says. “Rachelle has had a shit hand dealt to her, and when we say things, she’ll blush almost to her hairline. It’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.”
“Compliments will get you everywhere,” I say to add to that. “Make sure they’re genuine. Rachelle was with you during a really weird time for her. She was starting new meds, flooded with hormones from her period, and in pain. I’m just happy she didn’t kill any of you.”
“Is her period always like that?” Jared asks, looking pale.
Snorting, I nod. “Liliana is just as bad. I had this really crazy dream once in prison that they were both pregnant at the exact same time.”
“So you want kids?” Theo asks, eyes narrowing.
“Not right away, but yeah. Rachelle may not be able to be on her medication while pregnant. It’s something we’d have to discuss with a doctor to ensure we don’t fuck her over,” I mutter. “Did you really get your sex club psychiatrist to prescribe her medication?”
“It sounds so much worse when you say it like that,” Elijah says, rubbing his face tiredly. He’s been picking at his food and pushes it away finally. “Everywhere we called had a long waiting list or were shady shits. Dr. Parker was the best option.”
“Rachelle said that the meeting went well, but he asked a lot of questions,” I reply. “She’s gun shy around anyone in the psych field, and rightfully so.”
“Dr. Parker asked me why she looked like she was two seconds from passing out while they talked,” Jared grumbles. “He’s really good at his job, but everyone has fucked Rachelle over in the medical field. It doesn’t matter how well intentioned her first trip to the psych ward was. She was only fifteen.”
“All the bad shit seems to happen around then,” Elijah says, leaning his head on his fist. He looks really tired. “The past feels like it’s looming over our heads, taunting us.”
“Maybe that’s the issue,” I muse. “Rachelle and I don’t really talk about the past. She’s accepted my part in things, and has moved past it because she loves me. Give her shit to look forward to.”
“Like what?” Theo asks, his elbows hitting the island as he rakes his fingers through his hair. “We realized we both like the same band the other day, and when I suggested going together, she shut down. We fucking made her agoraphobic. Rachelle does well at the shop and out in our backyard, but leaving to go anywhere else is hard for her.”
“Before you say something dumb like that we should have patience, we do,” Elijah says, jumping in. I didn’t say shit, but go off now. “We have a system. The four of us walk to the door, open it and let her stare out while we hold her hand. Each time it gets better, however, her body fucking trembles as if she’s standing on the edge of a cliff.”
“Today was the best she’s done,” Jared adds. “We went out to lunch today and picked her up. She had a shake and French fries and smiled the entire time while we were at a diner. Rachelle skipped dinner because she wasn’t hungry, so we let it go.”
“Her medication may be kicking in,” I remind them. “This is why it’s so important to make sure nothing compromises that. She mentioned she hasn’t been to a gynecologist. Liliana is going to take her to the clinic tomorrow afternoon for birth control. We may be coming out of some of her anxiety. That’s good.”
“Rachelle bounces back really well,” Theo says. “Her resiliency blows me away. I keep waiting for her to lose her shit, but she just reins it back in.”
“That’s not necessarily a good thing,” I grunt. “I’ve seen her crack, and it’s really fucking scary. I’ll never forget the way shealmost jumped off the roof of my house because the voices in her head told her it would be better. They’re fucking liars.”
“The voices now aren’t like that?” Jared asks, his food also forgotten.
Gazing down at my scotch, I nod. “They don’t tell her to hurt herself. Instead they tell her she’s nothing and the world will hurt her,” I explain. “We’ve talked about it and they’re different from before.”
“Okay, good,” Elijah breathes. He looks shaken. I know what happened in the tower, I don’t think she was planning to jump. Rachelle got into her head and didn’t realize how close she was to the edge.
“Rachelle isn’t planning to leave us,” I say more forcibly. “You three need to pivot your interactions with her, though.”
“Tell us how,” Theo says after a long moment of silence.
Throwing back the rest of my scotch, I close my eyes as it slides down my throat. They think too logically and can’t let go of the past. That’s one of their largest pitfalls.
