Page 71 of Game Changer
“Yes, but I never got the chance to explain myself then, and I want to now. He’s . . .” I shake my head with a smile. “He’s perfect for me, and he’s going to State. He’s majoring in sports education to become a football coach, and if you’d go with me to a game of theirs, you’d see just how passionate and incredible he is with the kids. He treats me right, and isn’t that all you’ve ever wanted for me?”
I’ve rarely seen my father angry, but it’s evident in the redness of his face when he leans forward and says, “No. What we wanted was for you to be taken care of. He parties too much, smokes marijuana, and what about the girls?” He scoffs. “That will not—” He releases an aggravated breath as he struggles to find the words in English. “No. The answer is no.”
“Mamí,” I plead, tears filling my eyes. “Please. He’s important to me, and he’s nothing like you guys are painting him to be. If you’ll just agree to meet him, I swear you’ll change your minds. Ilovehim.” The admission is surprising to them, but it isn’t to me. I’ve known it for a long time, and it’s exhausting to keep holding it inside. For the first time, I’m being truthful with myself, which is why I keep going when I should probably stop. If the dam is already broken, why not ride out the flood? “He’s made me realize things about myself, and I—” Fuck, here goes nothing. “I’m meant to be a cosmetologist, and if I’m going to get a degree in business, I want to use it to pursue that. It’s all I’ve ever wanted to do, and he believes in me, you know? I can do this if you guys give me the chance to prove—”
My rambling stops when I notice my parents’ gazes bouncing from my mouth to my eyes. They’re having trouble keeping up, so I snap my mouth shut and wait for them to process it.
Papí is the first one to speak. “You want to struggle like us?” He waves a hand around the living room. “Is this what you want?”
“Ricardo.” Mamí tuts and cuts a glare in his direction.
“No. I’m not going to stand by and watch her throw her life away!” Tears track down my father’s face when he stands and begins to pace. “We worked too hard for this. We came here so you could behappy, and—”
“Do I look happy to you right now?” It’s been fixed in my head since I was a little girl to never cross my parents, but this is important to me, and if I don’t stand up for myself now, I never will again. It’s now or never. “Working in finance isn’t going to make me happy. Will it give me a paycheck? Sure. But it’s not what I want for myself. It’s whatyouwant.”
Papí looks as if he’ll keel over at any given second from the tone of my voice, and Mamí has a sheen coating her eyes as she watches our argument unravel.
“Increíble.”He laughs like he can’t quite believe this is happening before he forgoes English altogether and switches to his native tongue. I hold my chin high while he lists every possible reason Ethan isn’t good enough for me. He harps about coaching not being enough to support a family. Then he’s shouting as he insists Ethan’s personality hasn’t changed despite never getting to know him, and he tells me it’s impossible to have a future with him if both of our careers areunrealistic.
My father, who always supported my dreams as a little girl, is shooting them down one by one. But I should have known they were just that when I was younger.Dreams. He used to listen to me as a child gush over different nail polishes and even partook in some makeovers, probably thinking it was a phase. It never occurred to me then that he disapproved of it. He never thought I’d be able to make it on my own if I wanted to pursue it for a living.
But the one man who does is—
The sound of a floorboard creaking has all three of us whipping our heads to the screen door, and the sight of Ethan on the porch makes my world come to a halt.
Papí moves to tell him off, but my mother grips him by the shirt and whispers something in his ear that sounds an awful lot like a threat, just as Ethan throws his hands up placatingly.
“You forgot your bag,” he explains, setting it gently on the porch. His eyes seem adamant about not meeting mine. “Then I heard shouting and wanted to see if everything was okay, but I, uh, got my answer.”
How much of that did he overhear?
“Ethan—” My voice breaks when he shakes his head.
“I’ll talk to you later, okay?”
And then I watch him walk away from me and down the gravel path to his car. His shoulders are slumped and his body is rigid, and seeing him so devastated has a newfound rage surging through my veins.
“Is this what you wanted?” I whisper through my tears. “Ethanisa good man, Papí, whether you choose to see it or not, and I’m not going to sit here and listen to you degrade him and attempt to prove to me he isn’t. I’ve spent my entire life trying to please you both, but I want something for myself for once.Heis what makes me happy.Cosmetologyis what makes me happy. The only missing thing is your approval, but I refuse to continue killing myself fighting for it if it means hurting myself and the person I want to be with.”
I am stepping toward the door when my father clears his throat. “Bambina.” A warning. Plea. I can’t decipher the agony behind the word, but there’s no time for that when the man I love is walking away from me.
“We can talk about this,” Mamí says. I’m convinced she’s the only one with a rational mindset. “Just sit back down and—”
But I’m already closing the screen door behind me.
Thirty- seven
Ethan
“Ethan!” My name is a desperate plea on her lips, but I can’t focus on her with the ringing in my ears. My head is pounding, and my heart feels flayed open at her betrayal. “Ethan,please.”
A strangled sob escapes her throat when we reach my car, and because I still can’t stop myself, the sound of her crying makes me glance over my shoulder to check on her. Shelied. We had multiple conversations when she could have mentioned her parents loathed us being together. It would have explained everything, and I wouldn’t have walked around with all these insecurities over what the hell I did that caused her to ghost me when the answer was so obvious.
I’m pissed I didn’t figure it out sooner.
“Listen—” she starts, but I cut her off before she can finish.
“Nothing you can say right now would make any of this okay, Maya.” I inhale deeply, trying to rein in my emotions. She’s the only person on the planet who can make me lose control so quickly. “When did you plan on telling me that your parents despised me? When I came over for thecookoutyou said you’d ask them about?”
