Page 55 of Puck My Stepbrother
And I’d never been a risk taker. If I were smart, I’d pick Jeff and avoid disaster.
Smart meant nothing when I looked across the kitchen table at Levi and looked at his hulking arms and powerful chest. I couldn’t help thinking about what he’d told me about his dad. Levi had experienced his share of troubles, I now understood. I’d experienced my share of pain too, which meant I had more in common with Levi Dunn than I’d ever known.
I wanted him. Sure, I’d fought every temptation that crossed my mind, but that didn’t stop desire from budding and blooming. So far, neither of us had said a word about the other night when we’d snuggled up on the couch. We hadn’t touched the fact that we would’ve wound up naked together again if I hadn’t bolted.
Finally, I said, “We’re getting pretty close to the wedding. Have you gotten RSVPs for the all the invitations?”
“Two-thirds. That means I’m waiting to hear back from a shitload of people.”
“God, don’t they know we’ve got plans to solidify?”
Levi shrugged. He’d acted differently the last few days when I’d passed him in the house. He hadn’t seemed as strong and determined as before, but now I saw something in his eyes. It was a fire that burned hotter than any look I’d seen from him before.
He couldn’t focus on wedding plans any more than I could, but neither of us had tackled the topic we both wanted to discuss. Levi being Levi, he took the bull by the horns.
“You know, that was a bullshit move you pulled the other night,” he said.
I froze.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean to?—”
“Well, sorry isn’t good enough. I thought for a moment that you really wanted me.”
“I did, but?—”
Shit! Now that I’d said it, I couldn’t take it back. Not with how Levi Dunn operated.
“What I mean is, I was feeling something,” I said, “but I got really scared in the moment, and I didn’t know how?—”
“Then maybe it’s time to face your fears.”
“Come on, Levi, you know it’s not that simple.”
“Why not? I thought we had an understanding.”
And we did, in a weird way. Levi had opened up to me in ways I couldn’t have imagined. He’d shown me a side of himself I never would’ve believed existed. His muscles and smile made him hot, but his vulnerability made him beautiful. In that moment, I could have fallen for my old bully completely.
And then I came to my senses.
When I talked myself back into reality, I reminded myself that I wanted Jeff and only Jeff. I wanted to be with someone who used his mind. I’d never pictured myself with a hockey player, especially one who’d made my life so miserable.
But that was all talk. It meant nothing. When I looked across the table at Levi, I knew I’d hurt him. Apparently, I’d done the impossible. Guys like him didn’t have feelings, right?
Part of me wanted to change my mind and give myself to him completely. The Levi Dunns of the world held that type of power over guys like me. I reminded myself again that I wanted someone more like me, a guy my speed who cared about books and grades. I didn’t need to get caught up with a guy who got turned on by taking a hockey puck to the face.
“I don’t know, Levi,” I said. “I didn’t mean to lead you on or anything. I did what felt right in that moment. I wanted it, I really did, but the problem is?—”
Levi’s foot touched mine, his toe rubbing against my sole. That shut me up better than interrupting me with words. And then his enormous foot—a size thirteen or fourteen for sure—covered mine completely. I tensed up, loving every minute despite knowing I needed to resist. For a moment, I felt like a prisoner of my own desire.
And I felt myself grow hard again, something else I simply couldn’t control.
“What is it, Quinn? What’s the problem?”
I paused and drew a deep breath. Sure, I could resist Levi Dunn, but I knew he’d tear down every barrier in his path.
“I just think…we should slow down…think things over, and…”
I could say no more. The intense look in Levi’s eyes told me he didn’t really want an answer anyway. He would do the talking, but words weren’t necessary in his world.
