Page 58 of Knot Going Down
“I’m not upset,” I say slowly, even though I’m still wrapping my head around it. “I just… you said you wantedme.”
“And I do.” He’s still kneeling, still steady. “I meant every word. I want to be with you, Em. But I also want to see where things go with him.” He searches my face for a reaction. “I actually thought you might be open to the idea of including Lucas. I’d like to pursue you both. And if you’d like something with him, well, that’s up to you.”
My thoughts flash unexpectedly to Ava. Her smile. The guarded way she keeps her distance. Has she ever had someonewant her the way Declan wants Lucas and me? Has she ever had someone take care of her? What if she could be part of this, too? What if Knox could?
“Like a pack?” I ask, the words trembling out with fragile hope.
Declan blinks like he’s hesitant to bring me into the deep end of the pool where he wants to swim. “Possibly, but I want to know your thoughts on the idea of a pack.”
“I don’t know,” I whisper. “I don’t know. Withyou, maybe. With Lucas… Maybe.”
He exhales slowly. “That’s where I’m at, too.”
We stare at each other, the air between us heavier than ever. His hand finds mine, and he laces our fingers together, resting on my thigh.
“I think I’d like to see where this goes,” I say finally. “But, I’m scared. I?—”
He moves before I finish the sentence, gathering me into his arms. I’m wrapped in the warmth of him, in the comforting press of muscle and scent and the solid rhythm of his heartbeat.
“I won’t let anyone pull me away from you,” he murmurs against my hair.
I really want to believe him. I do.
But as I start to relax into his strength, there’s a loudknock knock knockon the door.
“Are you two decent or should I come back in ten minutes?” Lucas’s voice floats in, light and teasing.
I pull away from Declan with a startled laugh.Lucas. My thoughts are a whirlpool, but this feels like an opportunity. Declan stares at me like he knows what I’m contemplating, and wants me to take the lead. For a moment, I consider what it would be like to invite Lucas in, to try out exactly what Declan’s proposing. The three of us together. I was already planning on having sex with Declan tonight.
“Are you ready to watch the movie?” Lucas asks through the door.
“We should go,” I say.
Declan sighs, standing slowly. “To be continued?”
I nod, pressing a hand to my chest to steady my breathing. “Definitely.”
He lifts me to my feet, then opens the door. Lucas gives us a playful smirk. “I hope I did not interrupt anything good.”
“Not yet.” Declan kisses Lucas on the cheek, and a shot of electricity flows through me at seeing them together, even in such an innocent moment.
Declan strolls casually downstairs, but Lucas lingers, eyes cast down, toes scuffing the tile floor. “Did he tell you?”
“Um, yeah.”
He looks up. “And?”
I purse my lips as I think. It’s too difficult to meet his gaze head-on, so I do it in the mirror. “I’d like to see where this goes.”
“Good.” Lucas’s answering smile is soft and warm as he steps closer, brushing a kiss to the side of my face, just near my ear. “Shall we keep him good and distracted during the movie?”
“How?”
“Follow my lead,” he holds out his hand, “I did write the Beta Handbook, after all.”
When we get downstairs, Knox and Ava are already bickering on the couch. Ava waves a remote like a weapon while Knox tries to goad Gunner to jump up beside him.
“We’re watchingBlack and Blue Widow,” Ava declares. “You said I got to pick.”
