Page 102 of Private Exhibit
Oliver's voice faded, and silence drifted back in. Devon reached out, clawing for any sound. For any hint that he still clung to life in even the smallest way. He screamed into the void, into the universe, praying that someone might hear him. Someone had to know he was still there.
A low sob reached him.
Oli!Devon yelled, reaching for him. Oliver was still there. Somehow, Devon had to get to him.
“Hey, baby.”
Devon gasped. He froze, stunned, as everything went completely still around him.
Then time rushed back in. It wasn't Oliver. It was Andy. Devon flailed and screamed.Andy! Andy, I'm here!
“Gods, I don't think I can do this.”
Devon choked out a sob.I'm here. I'm here, Daddy. I'm right here!
“Dev? If you can hear me…” Andy blew out a heavy breath. “I know you must be tired of fighting. Tired of struggling and suffering. Gods. I keep telling myself to just turn off the machines. To let you drift away in peace. But I can't do it, sweetheart. I can't. I'm sorry. I'm not ready. I can't let you go. Fuck. I sound so stupid. I need it to be your choice, but I don't know if it is. I wish I could talk to you. Just once. Just to know what you'd want.”
I want to live, Devon cried.
“No, I know what you'd want,” Andy went on in a murmur. “You'd want to live, but not trapped in an attack. You'd want to live free. You'd want to see the trees and feel the leaves and smell the flowers. You'd want to feel hot water on your skin and soft fabrics under your hands. You'd want to taste that perfect cup of coffee and feel the warmth of it going down. You'd live each and every moment in a way that nobody else has ever even tried. Nobody else has ever come close. Gods, I wish Icould give you that, sweet boy. I really do. I'd give anything to give you all of that and so much more. I'd go to the ends of the world if it meant finding a cure.” Andy paused and let out a shuddering breath.“Gods damn it all. WHY CAN'T I FIND A FUCKING CURE?”
Devon flinched, hearing the panic and fury in Andy's voice.
“I'm so sorry, Devon,” Andy sobbed. “I'm so sorry.”
Andy…
Devon waited, straining to listen.
Andy?
But there was nothing. Just a long, excruciating silence until Andy's voice suddenly returned.
“Gods, I can't. I just can't–”
Devon thought he heard rapid footsteps retreating, then silence.
His heart sank.
Andy? Don't leave. Gods, please, don't leave!
But the silence persisted. Andy was gone. He'd probably given up and walked away, knowing it was hopeless. Knowing there was no point.
Devon wasn't coming back. Not from this.
He sank into the darkness, letting it carry him. All he could do now was wait.
Wait for it to be over so he could finally see everyone again.
So he could finally be free.
Chapter 36
ANDY FLED Devon's room, needing some air. He flew out the nearest exit and found himself in the garden. Andy winced against the bright light, both suns shining directly overhead.
Gods. He'd completely lost track of time. He must have been up all night and not even noticed when morning arrived. Andy shifted to one side so he could stand in the shade of a tree, covering a yawn and then scrubbing both hands over his face.
He had to stay awake. There wasn't a chance in all seven hells he was going to fall asleep and miss the moment Devon died.
