Page 103 of Private Exhibit
But he needed a tiny break in the meantime. A moment of silence to catch his breath and clear his head. Watching Devon lying there all night had been too much. The poor boy probably had no idea what was going on—according to the scans, he was in a state similar to sleeping—and Andy clung to that thought. It was the only thing that had gotten him through the endless hours of waiting. Of trying to decide what to do.
He couldn't bring himself to turn off the machines. Deep down, he knew he should, but his very soul revolted against the idea. There was no point in keeping Devon alive. Nothing could save him. Even if Devon woke up, the only thing he'd have was the remainder of his days, stuck in that bed.
Devon wouldn't want to die like that.
Andy whirled around and searched his surroundings, then strode over to the nearest window. He peeked into Devon's room, making sure he still saw the bypass machine circulatingand the gentle rise and fall of the boy's chest. Andy let out a shaky breath. He wished Devon would wake up. Andy had purposely demanded a room with a view onto the gardens, knowing Devon would like that.
But the boy would probably never even know it.
Andy spun away and paced the garden, then found an empty bench and sat down, hanging his head in his hands. The sounds of the city barely reached him through the lush growth all around. It was almost like he'd stepped out of his life entirely. He wasn't really surrounded by steel and glass and commerce, nor by white rooms sterilized to perfection. Andy was in a whole other world.
Devon's world.
Andy opened his eyes and purposely looked all around, taking his time, making himself absorb the little details that he'd never bothered to notice before. He saw fifteen different shades of green. Seven different flowers. Eleven different shapes of leaves. And that was all in what he saw to his right. He turned to his left and saw even more.
He saw a bee crawling over a flower. A bird, perched up high in a tree, cleaning its feathers. A ladybug climbing up a vine. Andy turned and lay back on the bench, looking up at the sky through the branches. From that angle, the sky was a brilliant, bold shade of blue, while emerald and moss colored leaves flitted and danced across it, alternately hiding and revealing the massive expanse beyond.
Andy pictured Devon lying beside him, that sweet, innocent smile on his face as he lost himself in the beauty of the present.
Movement startled him. Andy sat up and spotted his son just starting to turn and rush off.
Junior?
Junior stopped and turned back, standing there with a grimace.Sorry. I came to find you and then saw you there and…didn't want to disturb you.
Andy shook his head and turned to sit properly on the bench, patting the seat beside him.It's fine, he replied.
Junior sat down, gripping the edge of the bench with both hands.Any luck?
No.Andy rubbed his eyes and sighed.
You look exhausted.
Andy gave a nod as he yawned.
Junior was silent for a long moment.I'll go sit with him if you want to get some sleep. I can wake you if anything changes.
Andy almost managed a smile as he patted Junior on the shoulder.I appreciate that. But I can't. I couldn't do it with you, and I can't do it with him.
I get it, Junior murmured.I couldn't do it with Mom, either.
Andy blinked hard.Shit, he thought. He'd forgotten all about that.How is she?
She's fine. She's sad about the baby, but otherwise she's fine. I was there when she woke up from surgery. Doctor Crawford said it went well.
Andy rolled his eyes.Fucking Crawford. The man had another successful surgery under his belt while Andy's whole world was falling apart all over again. Andy sighed and gave Junior's shoulder a squeeze.I'm glad your mom's alright.
Junior nodded his thanks, then stared out across the garden, a slight furrow in his brow.Can he help?
Can who help what?Andy asked, feeling like he missed part of the conversation.
Doctor Crawford. Can he help with…
Devon?Andy finished for him, then slowly shook his head.No.
Junior looked deep in thought.If you'd known about it in time—if it could have saved me—would you have let him help then?
Andy's insides twisted, but he answered honestly.Yes. Gods, yes. I would have taken anything. Absolutely anything to make sure you would live.
