Page 28 of Capacity
“Subs?” He didn’t miss a beat. It made me feel like the heat surging between us was all in my mind. It was just as well because I had no business entertaining feelings like that when I was barely back to normal. I still cried myself to sleep at night and hid in the house during the weekends. I wasn’t ready for a relationship. I wasn’t even ready for friends with benefits. Not yet anyway. Whenever I was ready, I wondered if Knight would be willing…
…
When I got home after work, I tossed my bags on the couch and checked my missed texts and calls. I saw a few texts from Coco asking if we could hang out tonight at her house for game night with Luke and Andrew, then I saw a text from Mom about the picture I sent her earlier.
Mom: That’s an Aster flower. It blooms in late summer and fall. They don’t need a lot of care. Just loose soil, occasional watering, and sunshine. They represent love and patience. Clear those weeds away and let them flourish.
I walked over to the front door and peered out at the dead bush hiding the tiny little flower.
I didn’t have time for gardening. If I had my way, I’d put cement all over the front yard. I stood there looking at the little purple petals trying to push through the heavy dead foliage on top of it and sighed.
Maybe I’d move the dead bush so it could grow to its full potential. Nothing could grow with deadweight choking it. It wasn’t a promise to start a garden or anything.
I pulled out my phone and texted Mom back.
Me: Thanks for the info. I don’t have your green thumb but I’ll move the dead bush so it can get more sunlight.
Mom: Good. It could use some fresh soil too. The good kind with vitamins. I’ll come over this weekend and help you with it.
Me: Mom, I’m not about to be in the dirt all Saturday.
Mom: Like I said, Lumi, I’ll be there on Saturday. Now, I gotta get this pot of chili off the stove. I’ll call you later.
I laughed while I stared at the phone. She was a trip. I wondered if she knew she practically bullied me into gardening with her over the weekend after I said no.
When I walked into the kitchen, I leaned against the fridge and groaned. I was getting ready to call Coco back and tell her I couldn’t make it to dinner and game night with her and the boys. I braced myself for all the questions she’d hurl at my head and tried to map out how to maneuver around every single one of them.
“Hey girl, did you get my texts?” Coco answered on the first ring. Her bubbly voice made me smile. Maybe Knight was right, ever since I met him I’d been smiling more.
“I did but I can’t come over tonight. I have plans.” I squeezed my eyes shut and gritted my teeth waiting for her reaction.
3…2…1…
“Plans?” Her voice climbed in octave and volume. A laugh hid in plain sight behind her tone. “What are these plans? Do they involve a man? I thought you weren’t in the right headspace for a man right now.”
“Did I say my plans had anything to do with a man, Coco?”
“No, but the defensive tone in your voice tells me your plans have everything to do with a man, honey. Who is it?”
“First of all, it’s not what you think. I’m having dinner with Mr. Cunningham.” The silence boomed on the other end.
“Yourboss?”
“Yes. My boss. I went out with him last night and…”
“Youwent outwith him!” I pulled the phone away from my ear and laughed, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Lumi Foster, I’m disowning you. I can’t believe you’re just now telling me you went on a fucking date.”
“It wasn’t a date, that’s why I didn’t mention it. We’re friends. That’s it. He’s been sober for one month. He got his chip and he wanted to celebrate. He asked if I’d get frozen yogurt with him. I went. The end.”
But it wasn’t the end. I neglected to tell her about my moment in the shower and the way my skin heated every time he touched me. Shit, I didn’t even tell her that he did touch me. If I told her about the subtle way his hand always found my lower back or the way he kissed the back of my hand, she’d read more into it than she needed to. Knight and I were friends. That was it.
“Um, no Lumi that’s not the end. What did you two talk about? What did you wear? What did he wear?”
“It was right after work, Coco. I had on scrubs. He had on a button-down shirt and slacks. It was not a date.”
“Okay, I guess. How many other staff members were there?”
“It was just us. I’m the only person who knows he’s in AA though so we can’t count that.”
