Page 78 of My Kind of Trouble
Alex looked to Noa, who he could visibly see starting to retreat into her shell, to shrink herself like she had when she first came home, and he would not have it. Not after seeing her bloom into herself.
‘Your sister is a grown woman, Ryan. Treat her that way. I did what you said, followed along to protect her but, guesswhat? Noa does not need protecting by you, me, or anyone else, for that matter. She is strong and fierce and a force to be reckoned with most of the time. If only you would wake up and see it, then, maybe, you would truly see her. She’s got a sharp tongue, just like you, and makes for the toughest sparring partner. She’s not weak and does not need to be wrapped up in wool like you seem to think. When I learnt that, I backed off and watched her come alive out there. And, turns out, even though she didn’t need me there, she still wanted me, and so I stayed. Not for you. And not because of your need for protection. But for her. Always for her.’
Ryan stepped back, clearly at a loss for words. His expression morphed into a whole spectrum of emotions—shock, realisation, anger, hurt, resignation. His eyes snapped from Alex to Noa, who now stood there slack-jawed, and Alex wondered if he had said too much. But Ryan needed to hear it.
Maybe, Noa did, too. Because he meant every single word.
Chapter 46
Noa
‘She is strong and fierce and a force to be reckoned with’.
Those words rang in Noa’s head over and over as the bar around them zoomed in and out of focus. Never had she felt as seen as she did when she was with this man. And, deep down, she knew that had always been true, even if she didn’t want to see it in the past. Even if it was easier to keep the peace than blow up their whole world.
But, looking around her, it was clear that their world somehow blew up anyway. Ryan’s face was a picture of so many emotions—confusion, anger, hurt. Alex’s nostrils flared with the rage he had turned on her brother,storm clouds taking over his irises. The sound of the grandfather clock seemed even louder now, painfully so, in the tense silence that felt like it was strangling her.
This stand-off was exactly what she had always feared. But what she hadn’t expected was that, in all the mess, all she wanted to do was go to Alex. Because, despite every time she had shown him her weaknesses, he believed in her strength.
She’d been feeling so many things for this man for weeks but, right now, in this moment, she knew what she felt was love. So, without glancing at her brother, she went to him.
‘Can I stay with you tonight?’ she asked, voice barely above a whisper.
The words came out wobbly, emotion coating her throat and gripping her entire body tight.
Ryan needed to go home. He had said some hurtful things tonight. She knew he didn’t mean them. He was just shocked, angry, and lashing out. But nevertheless, he had chosen his words deliberately to pick on Alex’s biggest insecurities.
She knew she and Alex needed to talk about the pregnancy alone, and that Alex would need her tonight more than ever. She didn’t want him to spiral. She also hadn’t expected Ryan to look at her with such anger and disappointment in his eyes, and it stung.
He needed some space, and Noa needed to be far away from him until he could have an adult conversation, because she didn’t need this right now. No one needed to be happy about the pregnancy other than her and Alex and, until she worked out how she felt about it, she would not let Ryan influence that. It was too important.
Ryan’s shoulders fell, and he looked like the wounded little boy he once was. Sadness formed a band around her chest, heavy and debilitating.
‘Ryan. if you’d just let us—’
Explain. That’s what Alex was about to say when Ryan turned his back to them. Without a word, he slammed down the bottle he was holding and stormed out of the door.
Mature.
Now she turned her gaze back to Alex. His eyes were so comforting, the colour of some of her favourite things—tones of coffee and caramel, and the changing leaves in autumn. Despite the rugged, dangerous look and aura this man had always had, his eyes were kind. She never wanted to look away.
Feeling safer than she had since seeing those lines on a stick, she finally broke. She let the tears fall, and she fell into him. Alex’s sturdy arms held her tight, and she cried and cried until she had no more tears left and his top was completely soaked. He placed small kisses on the crown of her head, stroking down her hair, whispering ‘You’re okay’ in her ear.
She wanted to believe him. Somewhere deep inside her, she knew with him she would always be okay, but as he ushered her up the stairs towards his flat and she thought about how out of control the night had gotten, she knew she just wasn’t there yet.
Chapter 47
Alex
Having managed to coax her up to his flat, Noa curled in a ball on Alex’s sofa, almost like she was trying to make herself as small as possible. He hated seeing her like that. She gripped his baby blue blanket in her hands, like an infant clutched a comfort blankie. He watched her fists tighten and release over and over like she was using it to ground herself.
He knew Noa better than he knew himself sometimes, and he knew this was a sign she was becoming overwhelmed in her own head. But the fact that Ryan had caused the war likely raging inside her right now when he’d flown off the handle made Alex want to tearthe world down.
Tears streamed freely down her cheeks. He itched to catch them with his lips and see what they tasted like, to wipe them away, along with that scared look in her eyes. He needed her to know that he had her, no matter what. He walked toward her slowly, allowing her time to ask for space if she needed it. He would give her whatever she needed.
‘Noa,’ he whispered.
Her chin dipped down, and she stared at the carpet. So he got to his knees in front of her.
