Page 79 of My Kind of Trouble
‘I’ve messed it all up,’ she choked out in a sob. ‘He was so angry. I’ve never seen him so angry, Alex.’
‘He’ll live,’ he said.
Noa’s chin tucked even closer into her chest.
‘I’ve let everyone down again. I’ve let everyone down,’ she sputtered and cried.
This time, Alex didn’t hesitate, and cupped her chin between his thumb and forefinger, bringing her face up so her eyes met his. She looked shocked for a moment, but she didn’t fight him, like she was resigned and there was no fight left in her. She looked at him through tear-soaked lashes.
His wild girl, who had always managed to don her mask of confidence, who he’d always seen as self-assured and larger-than-life, had let the mask slip. He could see it in those eyes, the deepest cerulean blue, like the sky on a crisp, autumn day. She looked lost. And, fuck, if that didn’t wreck him.
He wanted to fix it. And he realised he would give this girl anything she wanted to do it. To see that spark that could only be her.
‘Hey,’ he said in as soothing a tone as he could muster with his heart galloping in his chest. ‘You have done nothing wrong. Do you hear me? Nothing. Your family loves you, and there is nothing you could do that would make that any lesstrue. You have not let anyone down, Noa, but you are failing to see one really important thing here. None of this is about them. This is about you. How doyoufeel?’
Her eyes went wide, and she blinked at him with a look of utter shock on her face, like he’d just asked her the most obscure of questions.
‘I…’ she trailed off and swallowed hard.
He followed it with his eyes and had to force himself to keep the indecent thoughts that the sight elicited on a leash at this moment. God, this girl was beautiful. Even now, with mascara coating her face and snot falling from her nose, she was the most beautiful woman he had every laid eyes on.
After a beat where Alex could see she was mulling over his words, Noa looked up and said, ‘Is it crazy that when I saw those lines on that stick, after the initial shock, for a moment I was happy? Before I thought about all the mess. I’ve done nothing but panic ever since, and mulled over every possible option in my head. But I don’t know, the thought of doing this… with you… it just feels like it was meant to be. I didn’t think we would end up here. Hell, nothing in my life has gone to plan lately, and I never used to think I wanted to be a mum. So, the feeling of happiness shocked me, too, but in that moment, I felt like I’d found purpose, and that brought me peace. Then I spiralled again, and it’s been a whole thing but, you know… that’s the gist of it.’
Suddenly, Alex felt as if he couldn’t catch a breath as he stared at her, in awe of how strong and beautiful she was. She’d always been a force to be reckoned with. He meant what he’d said to Ryan. She was fierce and, despite everything she’d been through, all the battles she fought in her head, that had never changed. Looking at her, all he wanted to do was stoke the embers that he saw burning in her eyes until she set him alight,too. He would dance in her flames, because this woman had owned his heart since they were thirteen years old; since the day he had met her.
Ryan had brought him to the Drakes’ house for his first-ever Friday night dinner. His eyes had found her immediately. She was tucked under a blanket on the sofa, a Michael Morpurgo book in her hand and she had looked entranced, completely lost in a fictional world.
She’d barely even noticed him, and he’d watched her—how her tongue slipped out of her mouth in concentration, her brow furrowing with concern, and the little gasps that occasionally escaped as she read. When Ryan flopped onto the sofa next to her, she finally looked up and Alex felt like he was drowning in the swirling pools of her bright blue eyes. His heart had been hers since that moment.
Right now though, she had his heart, body, and soul, and he was ready to show her exactly what that meant. He would be everything she needed, no matter what it took. He would not make his dad’s mistakes, because even the thought of ever walking away from her and his child growing inside her shredded Alex’s heart apart. He had never been so sure of anything in his entire life.
He nodded and, with that, gave her the only words that he could find, ‘Then nothing else matters.’
Chapter 48
Noa
The next morning, Noa awoke to the smell of fresh coffee and bacon wafting through the generously-sized flat. She hauled herself out of Alex’s comfy-as-hell king-sized bed and tugged on one of his old hoodies, preparing to go and investigate.
The living space was light and airy compared to the dark cave of his bedroom. She hadn’t realised she’d slept so long. She took in his space as she made her way toward the kitchen.
When Alex first brought her to his flat after they’d returned to Freymoor, she’d been shocked at itssize, as well as the lack of bachelor pad vibes. It was nothing like what she had expected.
The flat was three bedrooms and took up the entire footprint of the bar and, although the place was immaculate, it still had a homely feel to it. Picture frames dotted the walls and throws and cushions decorated the sofa.
The photos actually looked like a mini version of the gallery wall at her parent’s house, and that made Noa smile for what felt like the first time in over twenty-four hours as images of Alex trying to decorate this place, picking out colour schemes and furniture and trying to make it into a home, came to her mind.
She wasn’t surprised he’d drawn inspiration from one of the homiest homes that she knew. Her mum had put so much tender love and care into making it that way. It was years of memories and laughter shared under one roof, the kitchen cabinets painted her mum’s favourite colour by her dad, art projects like pieces of their childhood scattered throughout, and it didn’t take much for Noa to imagine this place being that way, too. She smiled wider, imagining that future where she got to help Alex make it that way.
Always one to follow the smell of coffee, despite her best effort and failure to cut down, Noa dragged herself toward the source of the smell. Her legs protested, body aching, likely exhausted from the adrenaline crash she’d had in the early hours of the morning. The events of the night still filled her with dread, but she felt comforted knowing that, despite it all, she was still here with Alex.
Stepping into the kitchen, her mouth began to water, but it wasn’t from what was cooking. Alex stood there in nothing but a pair of tight, white boxers, broad shoulders on display, the tattoos that decorated the expanse of his arms, shoulders,and back making him look just a little bit dangerous. He was glorious to look at, and her brain really did turn to mush every time she saw him.
But she couldn’t get distracted this morning. They had too much to talk about.
Clearly sensing her presence, Alex turned with a mug of milky coffee, just the way she liked it, and slid it across the granite island towards her.
‘Sit,’ he commanded. ‘Breakfast won’t be a minute.’
