Page 20 of Hermes
Those last three words of his pained me to no end. “I’m sorry, Crocus. If I could go back and change my actions from that day two years ago, I would. You have to know that.”
He let out a deep and heavy sigh. “Even knowing that, I cannot change the course of what has happened. You must understand, Herates…”
I could not believe Crocus had moved on from all that we had together. But at the same time, of course I could believe it. Why would he wait many years for a lover that betrayed him and his trust? I was in quite the dilemma here, losing the love of my life quickly. And when I feared losing something, those manipulative instincts kicked in. I needed to make Crocus mine. I couldn’t lose him to some basic female mortal.
So, I needed to prove myself to him, to show him that he was making a detrimental mistake in falling in love with this other person, when it was me he should be loving.
“But I cannot lose you, Crocus. You see, I was forced to leave you two years ago. I had no choice…” I then walked behind the nearby boulder to retrieve my brightly lit caduceus and my winged helmet and sandals, placing them on.
Crocus’ eyes widened once he saw these magical items in my possession. “What? But how? What is the meaning of this?” he asked in bewilderment.
“I have been hiding my true identity from you. I am indeed Hermes, the messenger of the gods,” I revealed to him.
“Hermes!? No… it can’t be true…” Crocus slowly stepped backward, further away from me.
But I couldn’t help but to move forward, closing the gap between us, to get closer to him. “It’s true, Crocus. I am so sorry I withheld this information from you. But it was for your own good.” I grabbed his hands and held them in mine as I became just an arm’s reach from him. “This does not change how I feel about you. I’ve never felt this way about anyone else.”
Crocus lowered his head, casting his gaze down to the ground, at the white sand. “All this time, I’ve blamed you. I thought you were being selfish with how you ended things between us. I’ve managed to convince myself that you used me and were a common drifter. But now… I am sorely mistaken, my God. I am sorry for thinking so ill-willingly of you.” He kneeled down on one knee in the sand, still holding my hands.
I shook my head, tugging on his arm, wanting him to rise. The moment he did, I placed my hand under his chin, so that he was forced to look me directly in the eyes, just as he did those couple of years ago when we first kissed. We had now come full circle since then, and I needed to seal this deal.
Leaning into him, I could not help but bring my lips to his, closing my eyes as we kissed. Crocus’ eyes bulged with alarm, but then I could feel his body relax as he eased into me. His eyes closed as well, and we became lost in the moment, passionately kissing each other.
My hands made their way around his back, while one rose to grip his head, pulling him more and more into me, our tongues locking together in what seemed like knots. I could feel his palms around my waist, squeezing tightly.
Right now, I could not care less about the woman he loved. I would put that to the side for now. All I cared about was getting this opportunity to be with him. To have him. This missed opportunity that I’ve now had to endure two full years leading up until this moment.
I felt a pressure overcome me as he pressed harder into my chest, prompting me to fall back into the sand as he laid on top of me. We both giggled at the sudden impact, but did not let that deter us from continuing to release our passion on each other, rolling around as we kissed, switching positions with me being on top of him and then him hovering over me, the next.
Before I could even rationalize what was happening, both of our tunics were stripped, and our bare bodies were making contact with one another. I moaned the second I felt his hand grip around my now hardened cock as he sat atop me.
“Does that feel good?” he intimately whispered, while stroking it.
I nodded. “Yes. It feels incredible.”
My approval was exactly what he needed to scoot further down toward my knees before he lowered his head to engulf my erection in his mouth.
The warmth of his breath and slipperiness from his tongue put me in a trance as he continued to pleasure me. I let him work me for a few minutes before I felt thirsty for his mouth to return to mine. So, I pulled him back up, our lips locking together once again as we held one another.
I wished this day would never end. I could remain on this beach in Corinth with Crocus for an eternity, just the two of us making love non-stop with the scenic sunset behind us. But before I could even paint the full picture of that scene in my mind, Crocus separated his mouth from mine, rolling off of me.
He abruptly stood up with a distressed look on his face.
“Is everything okay? Did I do something wrong?” I asked, wondering what could have prompted his sudden mood change.
“I cannot do this, Hermes. This is a huge betrayal to Smilax.”
Smilax. So that’s the name of his female mortal lover, I thought to myself.
“But I thought you wanted this… we wanted this,” I affirmed, hoping he agreed.
“I do. I want this just as much as you do, my God. But at the same time, I cannot do this with you so long as Smilax and I are together,” Crocus further explained.
“Well, what can I do then… tell me,” I pleaded.
“Nothing.” Crocus turned his back towards me. “I have to go, Hermes. I’m sorry. Please forgive me.” Leaning down, he picked up his tunic and quickly threw it on, before bolting off into the forest out of sight.
“Wait! Crocus! We can figure this out!” I shouted to him, but to no avail. He was gone, leaving me alone on the shore to myself once again.
