Page 1 of Meek: Chasing That Gangsta Love
SUMMER OF ‘2014’
THE HOTTEST SUMMER EVER
BOOM! Was the sound that woke me up out of my sleep; I sat up and grabbed my dingy white sheets holding them close to my body. The warm breeze flowing in from my room window was no match for the heat that was already locked in my tiny room. I listened for the sound again and heard nothing figuring that it was probably the wild nigga’s outside of my projects up to no good as usual. However, I couldn’t go right back to sleep after that, so I laid there staring at the ceiling. I tried to get comfortable on my small twin sized mattress and couldn’t for shit. Not only that, but the growling from my stomach was also ridiculous.
I stoodup and grabbed a pair of jeans that were already flooding my long legs and rolled them up at the bottom. I grabbed my shirt off of the floor that I’d had on earlier and pulled it over my head after pulling the wire out of my wired bra that was poking the shit out of me. I tried to keep it in the best shape because it was my favorite bra out of the two that I had, and I didn’t have much of shit else. Three pair of jeans, five shirts, and about fivepair of panties that I hand washed over and over, just so I could have clean underwear.
I wassixteen years old with no fucking guidance, my mother wasn’t shit besides a fucking prostitute and she didn’t give a fuck about me, the money that she did make, she spent on her damn self to support her habit. I had been fending for myself for a long time now and was ready to turn eighteen, so I could legally move far away from her ass; the sorry bitch didn’t even feed me. I promised that if I ever had children, I’d be a much better parent than she was.
I turnedon the lamp to search for my slides. It wasn’t that hard to find them since I didn’t have much in my room anyway. My mattress sat on the floor, and my tiny nightstand and lamp sat right next to it. I found my dirty white Old Navy slides and slid my feet in them before moving the sheet back that covered my window to see who was outside. Just like I thought, it was midnight on a weekday and sure enough everybody was still out. I slammed my window down and locked it before running over to my nightstand and pulling out the crumbled up five-dollar bills that I’d been saving for the past month, trying not to spend it for emergency purposes.
Since I hadn’t eatenshit in two whole days cause my mama hadn’t grocery shopped, this was definitely an emergency. I tried to open my door with ease, but that shit didn’t work as the squeaky old wooden door made all kinds of noise. I tiptoed down the hall and stopped to peak around the wall when I realized that the living room TV was on. Luckily my mama was nowhere to be found, so I felt the back pocket of my jeans to make sure that my house key was there before hauling ass out of there.
I hitthe block and headed over to the Mom and Pops store that stayed open all night. Five bucks would at least get me a loaf of bread, some chips and a drink. I could easily go back home and make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich since she always made sure it was peanut butter. She would make me go to the food drive every Wednesday morning at the church down the street and wait in line for hours just to get a box of free foods, so since they frequently gave out huge cans of peanut butter, there was plenty of it left.
I walkedout of the store holding my plastic bags in my hand and ignored the stares from some of the faster girls in my projects. You know; the girls who rocked big ass hoop earrings, designer fashions, kept a hairdo, and was fucking with a known or upcoming dope boy. They stood around on the corner sucking on blow pops, popping gum, and flashing their bedazzled coffin shaped nails while doing so. I usually paid them bitches no mind and went on about my business.
“Kisha!”One of the girls called me as soon as I passed by them. I didn’t even have to turn around to know who it was. I knew Dreka’s voice anywhere; she used to be my friend when we were younger until she started fucking with Meek. He was older than us by at least two years, but he wasn’t a dope boy although he ran with them. Meek was like me in a lot of ways. Our struggles were the same and he was always nice to me.
I slowly turnedaround to face her. “What?” I asked wishing she would say what she had to say so I could go satisfy my stomach.
She lookedfrom my head to my toes and smirked. “Nothing girl, I just wanted to take another look at your busted ass.” She fell out laughing and so did her friends. I didn’t even know what she was laughing at her damn self. Dreka didn’t have all the shit that her friends had, she only hung out with them to be cool which was stupid to me. I could’ve argued with her or said some slick shit, but my stomach was much more important.
I piercedmy lips together and turned around ignoring them bitches. I had to pass by some of the older niggas on the way to my building, which was building ‘E’ in the back. They were on the corner rolling dice and talking shit; I myself didn’t see how they did it because it was humid as hell out here. Meek was amongst the crowd, but he wasn’t paying me any mind since it was his turn to roll. Meek was dark chocolate with shoulder length dreads and the perfect tape. Even though he didn’t have much, he kept himself clean at all times.
Rags spottedme and called me out like he usually did. “Hold up Kisha.”
He joggedup from behind me causing me to slow up. He called himself ‘Rags’ cause ever since he started getting money, he swore he went from rags to riches but in my opinion, it took much more then what he had to get out of the hood… period.
He wasout of breath by the time he caught up to me wearing a pair of Tru’s with the matching shirt. His thick Cuban link hung around his neck with his Jesus piece medallion. He wore his hair cut low with waves. “Where the fuck you coming from this time of night?” He asked.
I grippedmy bags tighter as my flip-flops hit the pavement with every step. “To the store to get food, I was hungry.”
“You knowyou don’t gotta be living like that right?” He asked walking along the side of me.
“Like what Rags?I’m minding my own business.” I shrugged. I saw my building in view and got excited because I was ready to get back inside.
“You know what I mean Kisha.”He replied. “Won’t you let me help you again?”
Now see,here he had to come with the bullshit, I knew exactly what he wanted from me. A few months ago, our lights were off for a whole week and when Rags found out he propositioned me to suck him off for a few hundred bucks. I hated to think about that night, it was by far the fucking worst night of my life. Rags looked good on the outside but underneath all of that, his hygiene was fucked! His balls smelled like onions, sweat, and old cheese all in one. It was the first time that I ever did some shit like that, but I was desperate.
I shook my head.“I’m good Rags, if I need you, I’ll come find you.”
“Aiight Kisha,I’m just saying, don’t be scared cause you know I got you.” He said before walking off back to the crap game.
Yeah,he had me alright.I thought to myself as I turned the key to our front door. As soon as I walked in, I found myself ducking from the glass vase being thrown at my head missing me by an inch causing the glass to shatter all around me.
“What the-?”I looked up covering my head wondering what the hell was going on.
My mama was standingover me wearing nothing besides her panties and bra with a cigarette hanging from her mouth; both her hair and her eyes were wild as she hovered over me.
“Where the fuckyou been you little fast ass hoe? Who the fuck gave you permission to leave this fucking house, huh?” She raised her hand and slapped the shit out of me.
Stars formed in my eyes,but I refused to cry. “Mama!” I yelled instead. “I went to the store to get food, I swear! I haven’t eaten in two days ma.” I tried to reason with her by holding the bags up so she could see. I’d left the apartment plenty of times much later than this and she never said one word, tonight, she just wanted to be mean and take whatever her frustrations were out on me. She must not have made any money tonight.
“Shut the fuck up bitch!I didn’t ask you shit! Since you think you’re grown then take your ass back out the door, these are tricking hours and if you leave this late you damn well better come back with some money! Now get your ass out and don’t come back until you bring some money with you!”
I scrambledto my feet in order to avoid getting hit again leaving my loaf of bread and chips in the apartment with her. I was tired and weak, if I didn’t get food in my system I probably would pass out soon, or at least that’s what it felt like. I slowly walked back to the front of the projects and saw Rags engulfed in a conversation on his cell phone in front of building ‘B’ away from everybody.
