Page 36 of Lost Touch
Drew let out a triumphant sound and leaned back down over me, a bottle in his hand.
Lube. To fuck me. To make me all slippery for his cock…the click of the top opening startled me out of my fugue.
He let go of me to pour enough lube into his hand to get everything in the room all slippery, it looked like, but once he wrapped his slick hand around his cock—yeah, okay, he had a lot of ground to cover. Wet and shiny, he looked twice as big. I swallowed down the lump in my throat. It wouldn’t hurt, but it still…I’d feel the pressure of that, wouldn’t I? I’d know how deeply he penetrated me. At least I’d have that.
Drew reached down between my legs, his fingers finding my hole unerringly. One pressed inside, the calluses rough, the rest of his skin smooth. Hot. Forcing my muscles to yield, but it didn’t feel like more than that. Had I ever done this before, had another man work me open, make me moan? Had I liked it? Or had I slid my fingers inside a woman, getting her wet, making her moan? Or maybe another guy?
“Look at me, Ash,” Drew said, very low. “Fucking look at me. You’re withme. Not whoever the fuck you’re—fuck, you can’t remember. It doesn’t matter if you can remember,” he snarled, sounding completely unhinged. “I’mfucking you. Not someone else.”
I glanced up through my lashes. His eyes had gone wild, and a hint of fang showed behind his curled lip. Feral. He looked feral, almost not human at all despite his mostly-human features.
Like he’d been in the prison, when he’d taken me in his arms and told me I’d be all right, that he was getting me out of there.
A feral Drew didn’t frighten me. My arms went up almost of their own accord, my hands wrapping around his upper arms, and I pulled my knees up and back, bracing my feet on his thighs.
Drew sucked in a breath, his fangs dropping all the way, and he shoved two fingers into me hard and fast.
“You’re fucking me,” I said softly. “Only you.”
He let out a sound I hadn’t known a sort-of-human throat could produce and pulled his fingers out of me, spreading his hand over the inner curve of my ass to hold it open as he positioned his cock.
The view was as spectacular as I’d thought it would be: Drew’s dark head bent down so that he could watch as he pushed inside me, his broad shoulders, muscles rounded and hard, the lines of his collarbones, the expanse of his chest with its scattering of dark hair, the ridges of his abdomen and the jut of his hipbones…all of it. Masculine and powerful, and all for me.
His first thrust into me felt like he’d rearranged me, altered me to fit him, but it didn’t hurt—obviously. I thought it probably would have, though.
I also thought I might not have cared. Even if it made me bite my lip to keep from screaming, I didn’t think I’d have minded. Drew lifted his head and gazed down at me, his eyes shining with something so much greater than simple alpha magic—not so simple, of course, to a plain old human like me. But even the most spectacular display of pyrotechnic magic couldn’t have been as spellbinding as the expression on Drew’s face while he watched me open myself to him.
“Ash.” He swallowed hard. “Ash, gods.”
He pulled back a little, the friction of it so strange and new: not painful, not pleasurable, but a sensation deep inside where you usually didn’t feel anything at all unless something had gone horribly wrong.
And then he pushed back in, my lungs stuttering from the pressure. Deeper and deeper, and his breath came in labored bursts. Mine hitched and heaved my chest. My body reacted to his cock in me even if I couldn’t feel it consciously, prickles of sweat forming on my skin and my heart pounding.
I lay beneath him, shoved up the bed with every pounding motion of his hips, sheets rustling, the bed thumping and creaking.
I couldn’t look at anything but Drew, lost in the pleasure he took from my passive body, eyes glowing and glazed with lust and need. My fingers dug into his bulging biceps, as if I wanted to…pull him closer, push him away, control him somehow, but control was a lost cause.
Drew groaned, his head hanging down, and pounded me into jelly. I rode the waves of it like a tiny boat at the mercy of a thrashing sea, jolting up and down, biting my lip to keep my teeth from clacking together.
And then the pressure built and built, my hole stretching past what a human body should be able to take.
His knot. Drew’s knot, it had to be, shoving me wide open and forcing its way inside.
I let out a startled yelp as he came deep inside me, an odd rush of wetness and warmth held inside me by his cock.
Drew stilled, shuddered, and collapsed, his weight crushing me into the mattress and his face buried against the side of my head. His hot breath fanned over my ear and made me shiver.
Without any aches and pains—or the aftershocks of orgasm, presuming I would’ve had one from all of that—the other associated sensations came into sharp focus. Had I ever splayed my legs out like this before? It seemed unnatural to have my hips spread like this, my thighs pinned like the wings of a butterfly.
Of course, the unnaturally large knotted cock speared into me and stuck there might have something to do with it. I wriggled a little, trying to ease the pressure.
Drew groaned and thrust deeper, the pressure ratcheting up a notch instead.
Christ. Did people do this for fun? Not that the extreme fullness didn’t offer a certain sense of satisfaction, as if my body had been used to its limits, without anything more to give.
The subtle tremors that ran through Drew as we both settled down again made it clearhe’dhad fun, anyway. Or something fun-adjacent. Relief, if nothing else. I allowed myself to touch him, releasing the death-grip I still had on his upper arms and stroking my fingers over his shoulders, tracing the powerful muscles there, and then moving to his back. More muscles. More smooth skin. Like a sensory feast for someone who could be aroused by it.
Drew nuzzled into my neck, and a wave of tenderness welled up, washing away some of the regret and bitterness. I’d been a good sex toy, I was pretty sure. Exactly what the alpha ordered. Maybe he’d want to do it again? Let me hold him like this, bask in the heat of him, savor the weight of his body pressing me down and keeping me grounded.
