Page 89 of The Insufferable Duke
She looked at him, briefly; the scarcity of that look pained him more. He felt like a thirsty man, dying for that look, and he prayed she would give it again. She went to greet the others, then slowly moved around the room to come toward him. Formally, she dropped a curtsy, and he bowed, though it felt stiff to be so formal with her now.
“Helena.” Her Christian name slipped out, without any proper address. She smiled a little at that word and moved toward him.
“Helena? Helena! You’ll love to hear this.” It was Matthew, calling for her attention across the room.
“You and I must speak, please,” Helena pleaded with Christopher. He looked down at his glass.
“You and I both know it would not be appropriate for us to speak alone.”
“You didn’t seem to mind before.” There was a sadness in her tone as she looked down.
Does she still somehow blame me for what happened?
He prayed she did not, but before they could talk anymore, Matthew appeared beside them.
“Helena? Come listen to this.”
“Very well.” Helena’s gaze lingered on Christopher then she took her brother’s hand and was drawn away. The whole time he watched her as she sat with the others and listened to Isaac’s tales.
It was some time before he had a chance to speak to her again. They’d had dinner with the families and had retreated to the sitting room. He found her alone by the fire and walked toward her, intent on speaking, when Benjamin cut in front of him.
“Ah, Christopher. A little bird tells me you are fond of books.”
“Yes, I am.” He nodded, startled by the words.
“Then come. I’ll be glad to show you my library.”
Christopher shot one longing look at Helena before he was drawn away from her again. Inwardly, he began to curse Benjamin. As good and kindly fellow as he was, this was proving a hurdle to Christopher being able to speak freely with Helena.
“Here it is. My greatest pride!” Benjamin said and walked into the library. Many candles had already been lit, showing the room was full of books, stacked on mahogany shelves from floor to ceiling. Iron railings had been erected across a mezzanine level of more books, and there were spiral staircases reaching to the tops of many shelves. Above them, the ceiling stretched high, vaulted into a myriad of arches.
“Heavens. It’s quite a place.” Christopher was stunned, turning around in a circle. “I imagine one could lose themselves in here.”
“I certainly do as does Helena at times. I will be back shortly, Christopher. There is something else I wish to show you.” Benjamin left the room, leaving Christopher quite alone in the middle of the space.
He turned in wonder, admiring the library from every angle. He admired the Duke of Dunton’s great taste and found himself so lost in wandering between the bookshelves, he lost track of how many minutes had passed. Soon enough, he grew aware of the door opening, only Benjamin was not the one entering the room.
“Helena?” Christopher murmured in shock as she stepped inside. She closed the door hurriedly and walked in.
“I must speak quickly before my father returns.” She hurried across the room toward him, moving so fast that he backed up in surprise. Seeing him move away, she instantly stilled.
The guilt grew at once. He hadn’t retreated from her out of a wish to be far from her but more of a fear that she might still resent him.
“Helena,” he said softly, his smile appearing. “You should probably not be in here alone with me.”
“Why not?”
“Because it is scandalous,” he reminded her and stepped toward her again. He so wanted to be in her company that he cast his fears aside. She fidgeted and blushed constantly. Surely that added up to some admiration for him still. “After our siblings’ scandal and our own… transgression in that garden —”
“Is that what you call it?” She looked outraged, moving her hands to her hips.
“What else would you like me to call it?” he asked mischievously, holding back his temptation to laugh.
“Anything that that!” she said with vigor. “It was a kiss. Call it that if you will. Surely not atransgression.You make it sound as if it is something you regret, and… and I hope it is not that.” At her words, he raised his eyebrows.
“Is this your way of asking me for another kiss?” he teased her.
“Ah, I see you are back to your insufferable ways.” She walked away from him, waving a hand in the air as if to dismiss him. He couldn’t help following her, walking around the nearby chairs and moving toward her. She stopped in the middle of the rug and turned back to face him, her eyes widening when she found him so close. “I… I came to apologize to you.”
