Page 27 of Knockin' Boats
“Ash…” Sawyer glanced at me, and for the first time in years, I saw a flicker of the old Saw, the one who was my best friend. Then he shook his head, and it was gone. “Please don’t.”
“But why?”
“It’s over,” he said. “It’s done. Apologizing won’t change it.”
“I know, but… You should know that Mel and me? That was a mistake from start to finish. I think we were both just trying to make ourselves feel better in the wrong way.”
He snorted. “Yeah, it was such a mistake you dated off and on for the next ten years. You obviously felt a lot of remorse.”
“You don’t know the whole story.”
“And I don’twantto know it,” he shot back.
Frustration welled up. “I don’t want Mel. I don’t know if Ieverreally wanted Mel.”
“Well, great, you blew up our friendship for nothing then.” Sawyer slowed as we neared the shore. “Which house?”
“I didn’tmeanto blow anything up,” I insisted. “And it’s the stupid cabin to the right with the huge fucking boat next to it.”
“You and your huge boats,” he grumbled. “Why the fuck am I giving you a ride?”
“Because my stepdad is a raging asshole.”
“No arguments there.”
Time was running out. Sawyer was edging toward the dock. I turned, leaning across the aisle of space that separated us. “Sawyer, I just want to apologize. I know I was stupid and thoughtless.”
“And selfish,” he added.
“Selfish too,” I agreed. “I was mostly stupid though because it never occurred to me that you would be upset. You broke up withMel, and she said you barely talked to her, and you just seemed to be over us both after you moved.”
He gave me an incredulous look. “My life was a fucking mess, Ash! My parents got divorced, I had to move to a different town, go to our rival high school where I was not the most-liked guy right away. I wasn’t in a good place.”
“And we made it worse.”
“A lot worse,” he said shortly.
My heart twisted behind my ribs. “I’m sorry,” I said softly. “Your friendship meant more to me than any girlfriend ever could, and?—”
Sawyer sucked in a sharp breath. “Then what the actual fuck is this?”
I followed his line of sight, and shit, there was Mel, sitting out in a deck chair behind the guest house. Waiting for me at the worst possible time.
“I didn’t know she’d be here.”
“You’re full of shit, aren’t you? You’re still hooking up with her.”
“No!” I said. “We’re just friends.”
“I can’t believe I was starting to buy your bullshit about being sorry, about Mel not being what you wanted?—”
“She’snot.”
“It looks like sheis.She looks pretty fucking happy to see you right now.”
“Because we’refriends.”
“Friends,” he scoffed. “Right. Like we were friends? Just like that, huh? Because you kiss all your friends.”
